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Man Converts To 7th Day Adventism So He Can Watch NFL All Sunday Long - Article image
Faith Tips · Nov 9, 2025 · 50
Man Converts To 7th Day Adventism So He Can Watch NFL All Sunday Long

FRESNO, CA - Local man Dennis Townsend has converted to Seventh Day Adventism in order to spend all Sunday sitting on the couch watching NFL games.

Federal Judge Overturns Solomon’s Verdict; Baby To Be Cut In Two - Article image
Scripture · Nov 9, 2025 · 28
Federal Judge Overturns Solomon’s Verdict; Baby To Be Cut In Two

JERUSALEM - What had been hailed as one of the wisest decisions of all time was declared null and void today, as a federal judge overturned King Solom...

First Grader Anxiously Awaits Turn To Butcher ‘Für Elise’ - Article image
Family · Nov 8, 2025 · 64
First Grader Anxiously Awaits Turn To Butcher ‘Für Elise’

GREENSBORO, NC - A local mother and father joined the crowd gathered for another round of musical recital performances on Saturday, as their son patie...
Democrats Agree To End Shutdown In Exchange For 15% Off Coupon To Cracker Barrel
Democrats Agree To End Shutdown In Exchange For 15% Off Coupon To Cracker Barrel
Democrats Agree To End Shutdown In Exchange For 15% Off Coupon To Cracker Barrel - Featured article image
Politics · Nov 10, 2025 · 24

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The record-length shutdown of the federal government was finally set to reach its conclusion, as Senate Democrats agreed to end th...

10 Good Works That Don't Even Require You To Get Off The Couch - Article image
Life · Nov 7, 2025 · 59
10 Good Works That Don't Even Require You To Get Off The Couch

Doing good works requires time, effort, and energy. Or does it? What if you could rack up some good works without even leaving your couch?

Life · Nov 7, 2025 · 59
10 Good Works That Don't Even Require You To Get Off The Couch

10 Good Works That Don't Even Require You To Get Off The Couch - Featured article image
Doing good works requires time, effort, and energy. Or does it? What if you could rack up some good works without even leaving your couch?
First Grader Anxiously Awaits Turn To Butcher ‘Für Elise’ - Article image
Family · Nov 8, 2025 · 64
First Grader Anxiously Awaits Turn To Butcher ‘Für Elise’

GREENSBORO, NC - A local mother and father joined the crowd gathered for another round of musical recital performances on Saturday, as their son patie...

Subscriber Headlines

Man Buying 6 ‘Jumbo’ Candy Bags Unaware It’s Halloween

Oct 31, 2025 | JSwag


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Oct 30, 2025 | Nightrider


Gavin Newsom Reflects On The Time His Family Was So Poor They Ate At Red Lobster

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Rockstar Announces 'GTA 6' Is Now Available And Oh No There's The Trumpet Of God And The World Is Ending! - Article image
Rockstar Announces 'GTA 6' Is Now Available And Oh No There's The Trumpet Of God And The World Is Ending!
Entertainment · Nov 7, 2025 · 44
Liberals Trying To Remember What They Were Mad About Last Week - Article image
Liberals Trying To Remember What They Were Mad About Last Week
Politics · Nov 7, 2025 · 83
With Cheney Dead, Iraq Finally Admits They Had WMDs All Along - Article image
With Cheney Dead, Iraq Finally Admits They Had WMDs All Along
World · Nov 7, 2025 · 49
Man Can't Wait To Be Disappointed By His Favorite Baseball Team's Offseason Moves - Article image
Man Can't Wait To Be Disappointed By His Favorite Baseball Team's Offseason Moves
Sports · Nov 6, 2025 · 52
Mamdani Assures New Yorkers There’s No Problem Too Large For Government To Make Worse - Article image
Mamdani Assures New Yorkers There’s No Problem Too Large For Government To Make Worse
Politics · Nov 6, 2025 · 68
Unpaid Air Traffic Controller Now Just Deliberately Sending All Planes To Duluth, Minnesota For Laughs - Article image
Unpaid Air Traffic Controller Now Just Deliberately Sending All Planes To Duluth, Minnesota For Laughs
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Mamdani Moves Mayor's Office Under Children's Hospital - Article image
Politics · Nov 6, 2025 · 118
Mamdani Moves Mayor's Office Under Children's Hospital

NEW YORK, NY - In his first official act as mayor-elect, Zohran Mamdani moved the mayor's office under a children's hospital.
Mamdani Dethrones Gavin Newsom As U-Haul's Top Salesman - Article image
Politics · Nov 7, 2025 · 74
Mamdani Dethrones Gavin Newsom As U-Haul's Top Salesman

PHOENIX, AZ - New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani has officially been named this year's top U-Haul salesman, ending a record-breaking five-year s...
9 Best Times To Interrupt Whatever Your Husband Is Doing To Tell A Long Story - Article image
Sponsored · Nov 6, 2025 · 91
9 Best Times To Interrupt Whatever Your Husband Is Doing To Tell A Long Story

Ladies, sometimes you just have to tell your husband a really long, meandering story involving people he doesn't really know doing things that don't p...
Email Does Not Find Man Well - Article image
Life · Nov 7, 2025 · 65
Email Does Not Find Man Well

DENVER, CO - Sad reports indicated that a work email sent to a local man on Friday morning did not, in fact, find him well.

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Zohran Mamdani Horrified To Discover He Now Has A Job - Article image
Politics · Nov 5, 2025 · 111
Zohran Mamdani Horrified To Discover He Now Has A Job

NEW YORK, NY - In the wake of his overwhelming election win that signalled a dramatic political shift in the United States, New York City Mayor-elect ...
Nancy Pelosi Prepares For Sad Future Of Outsider Trading - Article image
Politics · Nov 6, 2025 · 96
Nancy Pelosi Prepares For Sad Future Of Outsider Trading

WASHINGTON, D.C. - With the announcement that she was finally retiring from the U.S. Congress and would not seek reelection in 2026, former House Spea...
State Department Issues Travel Advisory For New York City - Article image
U.S. · Nov 5, 2025 · 84
State Department Issues Travel Advisory For New York City

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Following the city's election of an avowed and unrepentant socialist, the U.S. State Department issued an immediate and urgent trav...
Jay Jones' Campaign Sends Out Celebratory Text Threatening To Kill Everyone's Children - Article image
Politics · Nov 5, 2025 · 62
Jay Jones' Campaign Sends Out Celebratory Text Threatening To Kill Everyone's Children

RICHMOND, VA - As part of his staff's afterparty after winning election as Virginia's next Attorney General, Jay Jones's campaign sent out a celebrato...

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Church · Mar 27, 2019 · 10
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New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #023: New York Tries Gay Communism - Article image
Premium · Nov 7, 2025 · 24
New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #023: New York Tries Gay Communism

The Babylon Bee is back to talk about the latest current events, such as Zohran Mamdani waking up horrified to learn he now has a job, the Dodgers pur...
New Video - Liberals vs. Conservatives Family Dinner Battle - Article image
Premium · Oct 31, 2025 · 25
New Video - Liberals vs. Conservatives Family Dinner Battle

What happens when a liberal wine aunt, a MAGA uncle, and the whole politically divided family sit down for a "peaceful" dinner? Spoiler: Chaos.
New Video - The Buzz #022: Battle Of The Bands - Article image
Premium · Oct 30, 2025 · 26
New Video - The Buzz #022: Battle Of The Bands

It's Halloween time at The Babylon Bee and also this week there is a Battle Box of the Bands since apparently everyone at the Bee was in a music band ...
New Video - Man Disguises Self As Illegal To Get Free Healthcare - Article image
Premium · Oct 24, 2025 · 18
New Video - Man Disguises Self As Illegal To Get Free Healthcare

This man had a genius idea: slap on a mustache and sombrero to get free healthcare- and maybe more!

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Report: Internet Users Who Call For Attacking Other Countries Will Now Be Enlisted In The Military Automatically - Article image
Report: Internet Users Who Call For Attacking Other Countries Will Now Be Enlisted In The Military Automatically
Politics · Jun 21, 2019 · 25
FBI Hires Top-Rated Italian Bodyguard Hiluigi Clintonelli To Protect Ghislaine Maxwell - Article image
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