Family
· Dec 6, 2024
· 125
The Babylon Bee Presents: More Accurate Wedding Vows For Him And Her
Since marriage vows don't always accurately depict what happens in a marriage, they can set unrealistic expectations.
Media
· Dec 7, 2024
· 98
Jumping The Shark? Hallmark Releases Christmas Movie SET IN SPACE
U.S. - Concerns have arisen that the Hallmark Channel has finally exhausted its supply of movie plots after the network announced A Celestial Christma...
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Morpheus Offers 40-Year-Old Man Ibuprofen Or Pepto-Bismol
Life · Dec 7, 2024
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Prosecutors Warn Daniel Penny Acquittal Could Lead To Rampant Acts Of Heroism
Headline Says It All · Dec 6, 2024
· 69
Paddington Bear Arrested For Telling Muslim Immigrants To Be More Polite
World · Dec 6, 2024
· 61
Study: 100% Of Your 'Super Smash Bros.' Losses Are Because You Had The Bad Controller
Life · Dec 6, 2024
· 71
Making America Healthy Again: RFK Jr. Announces Reduction Of 5 Second Rule To 3 Second Rule
Health · Dec 6, 2024
· 82
Walmart Ends DEI Program, Will Now Treat All Employees Like Garbage Regardless Of Race, Gender
U.S. · Dec 6, 2024
· 62
Buzzing
Politics
· Dec 6, 2024
· 138
13 More People Biden Is Considering Pardoning
President Joe Biden has been under fire this week for pardoning his son, Hunter, leaving political experts and the general public wondering what else ...
Scripture
· Dec 6, 2024
· 145
Cunning Adam Casually Suggests Eve Try Shorter Haircut
EDEN - The local man who had been given dominion over the earth reportedly attempted to raise the temperature in the garden this week, as Adam cunning...
U.S.
· Dec 4, 2024
· 150
Trump Announces Plan To Annex Canada And Rename It ‘Gay North Dakota’
PALM BEACH, FL - In his most impactful promise yet in the lead-up to being inaugurated in January, President-elect Donald Trump announced an ambitious...
Politics
· Dec 6, 2024
· 68
'Pete Hegseth Is Problematic,' Says Room Full Of Satanic Pedophiles
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Yet another of President-elect Donald Trump's cabinet nominees continued to face an uphill battle for confirmation from the Senate,...
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Must Read
Tech
· Mar 22, 2022
· 165
EXCLUSIVE: The Babylon Bee Has Obtained Copies Of Hunter Biden's Google Search History
U.S. - Hunter Biden's laptop has been validated by major new sources and the Babylon Bee has secured an exclusive look at the Google search history th...
U.S.
· Dec 5, 2024
· 137
Supreme Court Rules 8-1 In Favor Of Taking Turns Bonking Justice Sotomayor On The Head With Their Gavels
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The government's judicial branch continued to methodically work through remaining cases before the upcoming holiday break, with the...
Sponsored
· Dec 4, 2024
· 134
10 Things You Can Do That All Wives Find Incredibly Sexy
Women are mercurial, and every husband knows how challenging it can be to remain the object of a wife's attention and adoration. Fortunately, The Baby...
Celebs
· Dec 5, 2024
· 98
Tragic: Celebrities Flee To Canada Only For Trump To Annex It
CANADA - The celebrities who fled the U.S. in horror following Trump's presidential victory are finding themselves right back where they started: unde...
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McAuliffe: ‘I’ll Be Back And I’ll Get Your Children If It’s The Last Thing I Do!’
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AOC Switches To Republican Party After Jen Psaki Says They're The Ones Who Want To Defund The Police
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New Cruise Line For Christian Singles Promises Not To Go Beyond The Virgin Islands
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Premium
· Dec 5, 2024
· 88
The Babylon Bee's 2024 Wrapped
2024 has been a banner year for The Babylon Bee. We know because CEO Seth Dillon slammed his fist down on his desk and demanded to be updated on what ...
Premium
· Dec 2, 2024
· 143
ODT: Biden Pardoning His Son Hunter
Pardons by outgoing presidents are nothing new, but is Joe Biden pardoning his own son for everything and anything going back to 2014 a little crazy? ...
Premium
· Nov 28, 2024
· 128
Happy Thanksgiving To Our Bee Family!
Happy Thanksgiving to our Bee family! Whether you are with extended family, or have to work, or are serving others less fortunate, or traveling, we wi...
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· Nov 22, 2024
· 161
ODT: What Are Your Thanksgiving Plans?
Thanksgiving approacheth! Some people leave town for the holidays, others host a grand banquet, and some make it a point to watch football even though...
Greatest Hits
Hollywood Elites Rush To Normalize Pedophilia Before They're All Outed By Epstein Client List
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· 136
Immediately After Moving To Texas, Elon Musk Announces Tesla AR-15
Tech · Dec 9, 2020
· 99
Judge Dismisses Sexual Assault Allegations Against Biden On Grounds That He Is Not A Republican
Politics · Apr 28, 2020
· 14
Alyssa Milano Confirms FBI Investigators Have Not Reached Out To Her To Get A Celebrity's Opinion On Kavanaugh Yet
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Teachers Urge Government To Reopen Schools Before Students Learn To Think For Themselves
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