The Babylon Bee
Christian Living
· Oct 13, 2026
· 53
God Pushes Up Date Of Apocalypse After Seeing Greta Gerwig's 'Narnia' Trailer
HEAVEN - According to angelic sources, the Almighty God decided to move up the date of the apocalypse after seeing the trailer for the new Narnia movi...
Scripture
· Oct 13, 2026
· 38
Jacob Assures New Bride 'Rachel' He Wasn't That Drunk At Wedding Last Night — UPDATE: Oh No
HARAN - Following a night of wine and music, Jacob reportedly began to assure his new bride Rachel that he hadn't gotten that drunk at the wedding las...
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Crime
· Oct 12, 2026
· 102
9 Things DHS Found In Raid Of Ilhan Omar’s House
Federal agents raided Congresswoman Ilhan Omar's home on Monday as part of an investigation into potential immigration fraud. According to highly plac...
Politics
· Oct 13, 2026
· 64
Democrats Warn Trump Of Dangerous Precedent Set By Law Enforcement Raiding Homes Of Political Opponents
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Following this week's DHS raid on Congresswoman Ilhan Omar's home, Democrats warned President Donald Trump that using law enforceme...
U.S.
· Oct 12, 2026
· 64
Trump Tells Liberals Uncomfortable With Public Execution To Just Imagine It's A Healthcare CEO
WASHINGTON, D.C. - As public debate continued over the scheduled live-streaming of terrorist Nidal Hasan's death by firing squad, President Donald Tru...
Life
· Oct 13, 2026
· 70
Grandma Puts Scammer On Hold To Answer Call From Different Scammer
CHARLESTON, SC - Local grandmother Peggy Hartfield apologetically put one scammer on hold this morning so she could answer a call from a different sca...
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Politics
· Oct 9, 2026
· 138
10 Best Reasons To Vote For Democrats In The Midterms
The midterms are less than a month away, so it's important for you to understand who you're voting for and why. You may think that voting for Republic...
Sports
· Oct 10, 2026
· 45
Heaven Excited To Finally Get Answer To Who Would Win A Fight Between God And Mike Ditka
HEAVEN - Heavenly residents have gathered in rapt anticipation, excited to finally get the answer to the age-old question of who would win a fight bet...
Entertainment
· Oct 10, 2026
· 86
Plastic Bag That Blew Into Modern Art Museum Sells For $10 Million
CHICAGO, IL - A plastic shopping bag that accidentally blew inside the Chicago Museum of Modern Art sold at auction for $10 million.
Politics
· Oct 9, 2026
· 56
Mamdani Struggling To Find That Perfect Work-Terrorism Balance
NEW YORK, NY - Mayor Zoran Mamdani's demeanor suffered in recent days, according to observers, as he struggled to find that perfect work-terrorism bal...
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Premium Content
Premium
· Oct 13, 2026
· 62
Open Discussion Thread: Livestreaming The Execution
The Babylon Bee reported the latest breaking news about the upcoming America 250 Execution Spectacular:
Premium
· Oct 12, 2026
· 61
Snopes Saves The Day By Fact Checking Satire From The Bee Again
It's not easy for the humorless to discern real news from fake news. That's when they turn to reliable outlets like Snopes to tell them the difference...
Premium
· Oct 12, 2026
· 51
How Was Church? Building Your House On The Rock Edition
Hurricane Rachel is affecting parts of Southern California, with one particular stretch of homes built on a sandpit peninsula in Long Beach being hit ...
Premium
· Oct 9, 2026
· 31
The Babylon Bee Weekly Roundup | October 9, 2026
Welcome to the Bee's Weekly Roundup! We're here to catch you up on the biggest stories of the past week -- and to save our dear readers from the dread...
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