Babylon Bee logo Babylon Bee logo
News Bee Minus Shop
Newsletter
Search
Join
Join
Login
News Bee Minus
Newsletter
Shop
Search
Babylon Bee Babylon Bee
News Bee Minus Shop
Newsletter
Search
Join
Join
Login
News Trending
Newsletter
Shop
Search
Skip to main content
Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Claims It Was A Different Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Who Shot That Guy - Article image
Crime · Mar 24, 2026 · 59
Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Claims It Was A Different Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Who Shot That Guy

LA PLATA, MD - The alleged perpetrator of a violent crime publicly voiced his innocence in what he said was a case of mistaken identity, as a quadrupl...

Airport Wait Times Eliminated After TSA Checkpoints Taken Over By Chick-Fil-A - Article image
U.S. · Mar 24, 2026 · 62
Airport Wait Times Eliminated After TSA Checkpoints Taken Over By Chick-Fil-A

U.S. - Chick-fil-A employees began taking over TSA duties at the beginning of the week, and airline passengers noted that wait times were eliminated a...

Man Finally Admits To Gambling Problem After Placing Bet On Women’s Basketball - Article image
Life · Mar 24, 2026 · 50
Man Finally Admits To Gambling Problem After Placing Bet On Women’s Basketball

ANN ARBOR, MI - Local sports fan Adam Cartwright was finally forced to admit to himself that he had a gambling problem after he finished placing a bet...
Soldiers Issued Crocs So Trump Can Say He Didn't Put Boots On The Ground
Soldiers Issued Crocs So Trump Can Say He Didn't Put Boots On The Ground
Soldiers Issued Crocs So Trump Can Say He Didn't Put Boots On The Ground - Featured article image
U.S. · Mar 25, 2026 · 17

IRAN - The Pentagon has issued Crocs to the 82nd Airborne Division in order to allow President Trump to truthfully say that he has not put any boots o...

DEAL ALERT: Save Big On A 20-Pound Weighted Vest By Just Gaining 20 Pounds - Article image
Lifestyle · Mar 24, 2026 · 46
DEAL ALERT: Save Big On A 20-Pound Weighted Vest By Just Gaining 20 Pounds

Looking to expand your personal gym, but low on cash? Instead of spending money on a 20-pound weighted vest, try just gaining 20 pounds instead.

Lifestyle · Mar 24, 2026 · 46
DEAL ALERT: Save Big On A 20-Pound Weighted Vest By Just Gaining 20 Pounds

DEAL ALERT: Save Big On A 20-Pound Weighted Vest By Just Gaining 20 Pounds - Featured article image
Looking to expand your personal gym, but low on cash? Instead of spending money on a 20-pound weighted vest, try just gaining 20 pounds instead.
Man Finally Admits To Gambling Problem After Placing Bet On Women’s Basketball - Article image
Life · Mar 24, 2026 · 50
Man Finally Admits To Gambling Problem After Placing Bet On Women’s Basketball

ANN ARBOR, MI - Local sports fan Adam Cartwright was finally forced to admit to himself that he had a gambling problem after he finished placing a bet...

Subscriber Headlines

Trump Shows Off Pikachu Illustrator Card Given To Him By The Prime Minister Of Japan

Mar 19, 2026 | The Raider


Fulton County Still Counting Ballots For Kim Jong Un

Mar 18, 2026 | Twoplus2isChicken


Brits Resurrect St. Patrick To Drive Keir Starmer Off Their Island

Mar 17, 2026 | BabylonandonAnon

Visit Forum


Latest

View All
Another Massive Fraud Ring Exposed At D.C. Old Folks' Home - Article image
Another Massive Fraud Ring Exposed At D.C. Old Folks' Home
Politics · Mar 24, 2026 · 47
MLB Umpire Replaced With Cardboard Cutout - Article image
MLB Umpire Replaced With Cardboard Cutout
Sports · Mar 24, 2026 · 22
Live-Action 'Moana' Remake Saves Money By Getting The Rock $8 Wig From Spirit Halloween - Article image
Live-Action 'Moana' Remake Saves Money By Getting The Rock $8 Wig From Spirit Halloween
Entertainment · Mar 24, 2026 · 48
Considerate Video Game Boss Leaves Plenty Of Health And Ammo In Room Right Before You Fight Him - Article image
Considerate Video Game Boss Leaves Plenty Of Health And Ammo In Room Right Before You Fight Him
Entertainment · Mar 23, 2026 · 38
TSA Reduces Delays By Eliminating Colonoscopy Portion Of Search - Article image
TSA Reduces Delays By Eliminating Colonoscopy Portion Of Search
U.S. · Mar 23, 2026 · 82
Statue Of Cesar Chavez Gropes Woman As It’s Being Taken Down - Article image
Statue Of Cesar Chavez Gropes Woman As It’s Being Taken Down
U.S. · Mar 23, 2026 · 48

Buzzing

View All
CNN Calls War For Iran - Article image
Media · Mar 23, 2026 · 96
CNN Calls War For Iran

U.S. - CNN announced a shift in its reporting of the US-Israel war with Iran on Monday, declaring the conflict resolved. In light of this major update...
8 Tips For Getting Through TSA Faster - Article image
U.S. · Mar 23, 2026 · 65
8 Tips For Getting Through TSA Faster

With the tug-of-war over funding for the Department of Homeland Security leaving the Transportation Security Administration short on agents, getting t...
Trump Releases Line Of Sympathy Cards - Article image
Celebs · Mar 23, 2026 · 73
Trump Releases Line Of Sympathy Cards

U.S. - Separate from his work as the nation's commander in chief, President Donald Trump announced that he was releasing a line of specialty sympathy ...
Terrorists Give Up After Three Hours In TSA Line - Article image
U.S. · Mar 24, 2026 · 30
Terrorists Give Up After Three Hours In TSA Line

NEW YORK, NY - A terrorist became frustrated and decided the attack he had been planning wasn't worth the trouble after spending three hours in the TS...

Must Read

Trump Postpones Iran Strikes Until They All Assemble In One Place Again For A Meeting - Article image
World · Mar 23, 2026 · 59
Trump Postpones Iran Strikes Until They All Assemble In One Place Again For A Meeting

WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a promising sign that the weeks-long conflict in the Middle East could soon be over, President Donald Trump postponed strikes ag...
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child - Article image
Sponsored · Dec 15, 2021 · 174
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child

First off, congratulations on raising a child already versed in progressive ideals! Your Christmas holiday is sure to be filled with joy, laughter, fe...
Paddleboat Ride Enjoyable For Seven Seconds - Article image
Lifestyle · Mar 23, 2026 · 77
Paddleboat Ride Enjoyable For Seven Seconds

STANLEY, ID - A paddleboat ride at a local lake resulted in about seven seconds of enjoyment for a local couple, followed by twenty minutes of pain, w...
After Jesus Bestows Nicknames ‘The Rock’ And ‘Sons Of Thunder’, Apostle James Bummed To Get Stuck With ‘The Lesser’ - Article image
Scripture · Mar 22, 2026 · 74
After Jesus Bestows Nicknames ‘The Rock’ And ‘Sons Of Thunder’, Apostle James Bummed To Get Stuck With ‘The Lesser’

JUDEA - With his fellow apostles scoring nicknames from Jesus like "The Rock" and "Sons of Thunder," the Apostle James admitted to feeling a tad bit d...

Don't Miss

Abortion Doctors Say If Roe Overturned They'll Move To A Place More Welcoming Of Abortion Like North Korea - Article image
Worldviews · May 9, 2022 · 69
Abortion Doctors Say If Roe Overturned They'll Move To A Place More Welcoming Of Abortion Like North Korea

U.S. - As the US Supreme Court threatens to overturn Roe v. Wade, abortion doctors around the country are vowing that if that happens, they will pack ...
Trump Safe, Leaving Only One Dead Candidate - Article image
Trump Safe, Leaving Only One Dead Candidate
U.S. · Jul 13, 2024 · 130
Local Pastor Admits To Being Qualified - Article image
Local Pastor Admits To Being Qualified
Church · Mar 18, 2016 · 9
Stimulus Package Projected To Save The Lives Of At Least 85,000 Government Programs - Article image
Stimulus Package Projected To Save The Lives Of At Least 85,000 Government Programs
Politics · Mar 31, 2020 · 9
The Babylon Bee Would Like To Inform Tim Walz We Are Now A Functioning Daycare In Minnesota - Article image
The Babylon Bee Would Like To Inform Tim Walz We Are Now A Functioning Daycare In Minnesota
U.S. · Dec 28, 2025 · 109
Bad Luck: Trump Says The Missing Epstein Files Were In The East Wing And Have Now Been Destroyed - Article image
Bad Luck: Trump Says The Missing Epstein Files Were In The East Wing And Have Now Been Destroyed
Politics · Oct 27, 2025 · 49
Trump Distracts From Previous Racist Tweets With New Racist Tweets - Article image
Trump Distracts From Previous Racist Tweets With New Racist Tweets
Politics · Jul 15, 2019 · 6

Premium Content

View All
New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims - Article image
Premium · Mar 12, 2026 · 25
New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims

Muslims are in the news this week after two Pennsylvania teenagers crossed into New York City for what could have been a normal day enjoying the city ...
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test - Article image
Premium · Mar 12, 2026 · 31
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test

Do you think you can guess the terrorist in this thumbnail? If so, you are a racist. Unconscious bias is a type of systematically deeply integrated so...
New Video - News Media Successfully Avoids Reporting News - Article image
Premium · Mar 10, 2026 · 30
New Video - News Media Successfully Avoids Reporting News

Secret Service interrupts the most handsome President of the United States of America in the world to share some explosive news - unfortunately, it's ...
New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader - Article image
Premium · Mar 5, 2026 · 49
New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader

The Iranian government has officially announced a successor to Ayatollah Khamenei, introducing today the new Supreme Leader - wait, they have now anno...

Greatest Hits

View All
Trump Says To Drink Lots Of Water, Media Reports He Told Everyone To Drown Themselves - Article image
Trump Says To Drink Lots Of Water, Media Reports He Told Everyone To Drown Themselves
Politics · Apr 24, 2020 · 16
Six-Year-Old Saying, 'Why Don't We Just Give Everything Away For Free?' Surges To Top Of Democratic Polls - Article image
Six-Year-Old Saying, 'Why Don't We Just Give Everything Away For Free?' Surges To Top Of Democratic Polls
Politics · Aug 13, 2019 · 14
Man Identifying As 6-Year-Old Crushes Game-Winning Homer In Tee-Ball Championship - Article image
Man Identifying As 6-Year-Old Crushes Game-Winning Homer In Tee-Ball Championship
Lifestyle · Jun 6, 2017 · 37
Congress Members To Wear Barcodes So Lobbyists Can Scan Prices, Self-Checkout - Article image
Congress Members To Wear Barcodes So Lobbyists Can Scan Prices, Self-Checkout
Politics · Jun 21, 2019 · 18
Biden Cuts Hole In Mask So He Can Still Sniff People's Hair - Article image
Biden Cuts Hole In Mask So He Can Still Sniff People's Hair
Politics · Apr 9, 2020 · 28
Alyssa Milano Confirms FBI Investigators Have Not Reached Out To Her To Get A Celebrity's Opinion On Kavanaugh Yet - Article image
Alyssa Milano Confirms FBI Investigators Have Not Reached Out To Her To Get A Celebrity's Opinion On Kavanaugh Yet
Politics · Oct 2, 2018 · 13

All News

Support

  • Contact
  • About
  • Terms
  • Privacy

Our Sites

  • The Babylon Bee
  • Not the Bee

Socials

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • X (Twitter)

Other Links

  • YouTube
  • RSS
Facebook Instagram Twitter YouTube RSS

© 2026 Babylon Bee. All rights reserved.