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· Mar 21, 2026
· 36
Saint Peter Gently Asks Chuck Norris To Stop Roundhouse Kicking The Cherubim
HEAVEN - After several incidents over the course of his first day in paradise, Chuck Norris was pulled aside by Saint Peter and gently asked to please...
Family
· Mar 21, 2026
· 47
Man Smokes Cigar In Desperate Hope To Feel Sick And Become Unattractive To Wife
HOUSTON, TX - Local man Matthew Coggins lit up a cigar this afternoon in a bid to feel terribly nauseous while simultaneously causing his wife to find...
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Confirmed: In His Final Days, Charlie Kirk Came To Agree With Whatever You Believe
Worldviews · Mar 20, 2026
· 54
Theologians Believe Every Meal In Heaven Is Ice Cream In A Miniature Baseball Helmet
Theology · Mar 20, 2026
· 48
Newsom Allocates $900 Million For Black Bear Porta-Potties
Politics · Mar 20, 2026
· 76
Tucker Carlson Loses On ‘Wheel Of Fortune’ After Guessing ‘Israel' On Every Puzzle
Entertainment · Mar 19, 2026
· 80
MLB Introduces Popular New Rule Where Umps Who Get More Than 3 Calls Overturned Are Jettisoned Into The Sun
Sports · Mar 19, 2026
· 72
Gay Ayatollah Excited After Receiving DM From Cute Guy Jamesmohammed O'Keefibad
World · Mar 19, 2026
· 40
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Celebs
· Mar 20, 2026
· 64
'Fear Not!' Says Chuck Norris To Calm Trembling Angels
HEAVEN - A group of seraphim guarding the gates of Heaven was terrified yesterday by the sudden appearance of legendary martial artist and action star...
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· Mar 19, 2026
· 117
Gavin Newsom's 10 Biggest Accomplishments
California owes a lot to Governor Gavin Newsom. So much, in fact, that it's hard to narrow down his long list of accomplishments.
Culture
· Mar 20, 2026
· 62
Local Man Likes His Coffee Cold, With Milk, Just Like A Little Baby
SEATTLE, WA - According to sources, local man Richard Stevenson prefers to take his coffee cold and with milk like a little baby.
Politics
· Mar 20, 2026
· 53
California Abandons $250 Billion Study On Why It Has So Many Unfinished Projects
SACRAMENTO, CA - California's $250 billion study looking into why it has so many unfinished projects was abandoned while only half-finished, the gover...
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World
· Mar 18, 2026
· 62
8 Coolest Perks Of Becoming The New Ayatollah
The hottest job on the market right now is being the Iranian Ayatollah, but why is everyone suddenly buzzing about it? Here are just eight of the most...
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· Dec 15, 2021
· 174
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child
First off, congratulations on raising a child already versed in progressive ideals! Your Christmas holiday is sure to be filled with joy, laughter, fe...
U.S.
· Mar 19, 2026
· 65
California Celebrates Installation Of Single L.A. Trash Can That Cost $400 Billion And Took 18 Years To Build
LOS ANGELES, CA - California state and city officials gathered with residents on Thursday to celebrate the opening of a public trash can that cost jus...
World
· Mar 16, 2026
· 88
9 Clear Signs The Ayatollah Is Gay
In addition to reports that he was seriously injured in airstrikes at the onset of the U.S.-Iran conflict, new rumors arose this week that the newly c...
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· Mar 12, 2026
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New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims
Muslims are in the news this week after two Pennsylvania teenagers crossed into New York City for what could have been a normal day enjoying the city ...
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· Mar 12, 2026
· 31
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test
Do you think you can guess the terrorist in this thumbnail? If so, you are a racist. Unconscious bias is a type of systematically deeply integrated so...
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· Mar 10, 2026
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New Video - News Media Successfully Avoids Reporting News
Secret Service interrupts the most handsome President of the United States of America in the world to share some explosive news - unfortunately, it's ...
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· Mar 5, 2026
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New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader
The Iranian government has officially announced a successor to Ayatollah Khamenei, introducing today the new Supreme Leader - wait, they have now anno...
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· 31
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