Tesla Cybertruck Voted 'Worst Vehicle' By National Association Of Terrorist Car Bombers
U.S. · Jan 2, 2025 · BabylonBee.com

U.S. — Following its poor performance in the attack outside the Trump Hotel in Las Vegas this week, the Tesla Cybertruck was unanimously voted Worst Vehicle by members of the National Association of Terrorist Car Bombers.

The group took an official survey of its membership after the Trump Hotel bombing, with a startling 100% of responders giving the Cybertruck the lowest possible score for its suitability for the association's work.

"Terrible job. Hard pass," said Anthony Larson, Vice President of the NATCB. "While other manufacturers do a great job of designing vehicles that perform well during terrorist bombing attacks, Tesla has really dropped the ball with the Cybertruck. It has shown itself to be completely inadequate for our needs. Not sure what Elon Musk and his team were thinking when they were making this one."

Other members of the organization were equally disappointed. "It's almost as if Tesla gave no consideration to how the Cybertruck would do when fashioned into a weapon of mass destruction," said Anwar Al Habib. "How are we supposed to use this vehicle to kill innocent, unsuspecting people when the bomb blast barely makes it out of the cab? Ridiculous. Give me an old windowless Dodge van, thank you."

While members did compliment the Cybertruck for its innovative look, surprising towing strength, and energy efficiency, they all said its dreadful rating as a car bombing vehicle was a deal-breaker.

At publishing time, in yet another poor review, the Cybertruck had also been named Worst in Class by Car Bomber magazine.


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