INGLEWOOD, CA - In a move celebrated by social justice leaders around the world, NBC has removed artists Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg from the Super Bowl LVI Halftime show after discovering multiple past recordings of the rappers cavalierly using the n-word.
"We were stunned when these tapes were brought to our attention," said NBC executive Gil McFasterson. "Snoop and Dre were caught openly throwing this disgusting, offensive term back and forth, referring to each other as 'my N*****', and to themselves as 'two loc'ed out N*****s.' We even learned that Dr. Dre was once in a music group called N.W.A., which he told us stood for 'Nerds With Attitude.' Turns out that was a lie."
NBC uncovered several recordings, including an entire album from 1992, "The Chronic," featuring both rappers dropping n-words throughout. The press release announcing NBC's decision referenced many examples of the artists' bigoted hate speech. In his recording titled "Still D.R.E.", Dr. Dre unrepentantly declares "It's still Dre Day N*****, AK N*****." The intolerant and prejudiced Dre asks the offensive question "What all the N*****s sayin'?" on the track "Let Me Ride." Not be outdone, during his song "Drop It Like It's Hot", Snoop Dogg tells his fans no fewer than 4 times exactly what to do "If a N***** get a attitude..."
"We apologize in advance that we even considered featuring these obvious racists during the halftime extravaganza," said McFasterson, nearly inconsolable.
In this instructional video, Chinese soldiers are trained how to shout the wrong pronouns at American forces: