The Babylon Bee
Anonymous Sources/Demon Bread/Weird Christian Videos News Show 9.11.2020

This is The Babylon Bee Weekly News Show for the week of 9/11/2020.

Watch or listen to this episode on our podcast page, where subscribers can find full length episodes, or over on our YouTube channel. Subscribe using your favorite podcast platform here.

In this episode of The Babylon Bee Podcast, Kyle and Ethan talk about the week’s biggest stories like California’s progressive green energy grid leading the nation in brownouts, anonymous sources totally confirming that Trump punched a baby, and a man blowing up his house in an attempt to swat a fly. Kyle and Ethan also dig into the video archives to find really weird videos from Christian music and educational programming to talk about how weird they are. For example, why is that loaf of bread talking to us?

Intro

Kyle and Ethan discuss September 11 and Frank J. Fleming’s Superego: Fathom Audible release.

Stuff That’s Good

Kyle likes the video game Fall Guys.

Ethan likes a Youtube Channel called Corridor Crew.

Weird News

Stories of the Week

Governor Newsom Claims Rolling Blackouts Are To Show Support For Black Lives Matter

Summary: California has been experiencing blackouts across the state. While many thought the blackouts were due to poor planning and unrealistic green energy requirements, Governor Gavin Newsom clarified that he ordered the blackouts as a powerful display supporting BLM.

  • CA passed AB-32 in 2006 which basically says the state should be half green energy by 2025.

  • CA currently is about 30% powered by wind and solar (mostly solar)

  • During heatwaves there is no wind, and at night there is no sun, so at night, CA loses nearly 30% of its energy. 

  • SCIENCE!

'Humans Are Basically Good,' Says Man Who Has Never Met A 3-Year-Old

Summary: Local man Chad Bruner says he believes all humans are born good, that altruism is man’s natural state, and that it is society and parenting that corrupts them. Incidentally, Bruner had no younger siblings, no kids of his own, not even any nephews or nieces or even some neighbor kids. When asked ‘Have you ever even met a three year old once in your life?” he answered no.

Anonymous White House Source Claims Trump Punched A Baby

Summary: According to an anonymous source in the White House, President Trump shocked aides and other staffers last year when he lost his temper and punched a baby in the face.

  • The Atlantic published a piece saying that Trump called the dead soldiers in a war “losers.”

  • When [John] McCain died, in August 2018, Trump told his senior staff, according to three sources with direct knowledge of this event, 'We're not going to support that loser's funeral,' and he became furious, according to witnesses, when he saw flags lowered to half-staff. 'What the f--- are we doing that for? Guy was a f---ing loser,' the president told aides."

  • Trump and many from the White House staff have forcibly denied the allegations published in The Atlantic on Thursday, alleging, according to four unnamed sources, that the president referred to dead soldiers buried at the Aisne-Marne American cemetery near Paris as "suckers" and that the land was "filled with losers" during his visit to France in 2018.

  • People present came out and said it didn’t happen, including our favorite walrus, John Bolton.

Topic of the Week

The Babylon Bee Writers React to Weird Christian Videos

Jesus is a Friend of Mine  

Third Eagle of the Apocalypse 

The Renewed Mind Is The Key

Carman - A Witch’s Invitation

Creepy bread loaf at minute 1:50

Hate Mail

Young earth creationists really weren't happy about our recent interview and one guy wrote to make sure we knew Trump didn't punch that baby.

Subscriber Portion

Calvin H. sent in audio and wants to know from Kyle what a libertarian America would look like and the guys tell more stories about crazy stuff that neighbors and family friends have done to them.

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