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Taco Bell Releases New Imodium A-D Sauce Packets To Combat Explosive Diarrhea Outbreak - Article image
Health · Jul 17, 2026 · 59
Taco Bell Releases New Imodium A-D Sauce Packets To Combat Explosive Diarrhea Outbreak

U.S. - Fast-food giant Taco Bell introduced Imodium A-D sauce packets to help customers combat the explosive diarrhea caused by consuming the restaura...

Civil Engineer Really Starting To Regret Building City On Rock & Roll - Article image
Life · Jul 17, 2026 · 50
Civil Engineer Really Starting To Regret Building City On Rock & Roll

U.S. - Civil engineer David Sharpe started out with an ambitious goal to build a city on rock and roll, but now says he should have just stuck with mo...

Netflix Announces New Animated Film 'Bro-Country Demon Hunters' - Article image
Entertainment · Jul 18, 2026 · 41
Netflix Announces New Animated Film 'Bro-Country Demon Hunters'

U.S. - Hoping to piggyback off of their smash hit "K-Pop Demon Hunters," Netflix has announced a new animated film coming in fall 2026 entitled "Bro-C...
Democrats Say They Are Perfectly Capable Of Rigging Elections Without Any Help From China
Democrats Say They Are Perfectly Capable Of Rigging Elections Without Any Help From China
Democrats Say They Are Perfectly Capable Of Rigging Elections Without Any Help From China - Featured article image
Politics · Jul 17, 2026 · 55

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Democrats disputed claims that China interfered in the 2020 U.S. election, declaring that they are perfectly capable of rigging ele...

Texas Approves Death Penalty For Anyone Who Starts An Email With 'Happy Monday, Team!' - Article image
Business · Jul 17, 2026 · 31
Texas Approves Death Penalty For Anyone Who Starts An Email With 'Happy Monday, Team!'

AUSTIN, TX - Governor Greg Abbott signed into law this morning a new measure that would impose the death penalty on anyone who begins an email with "H...

Business · Jul 17, 2026 · 31
Texas Approves Death Penalty For Anyone Who Starts An Email With 'Happy Monday, Team!'

Texas Approves Death Penalty For Anyone Who Starts An Email With 'Happy Monday, Team!' - Featured article image
AUSTIN, TX - Governor Greg Abbott signed into law this morning a new measure that would impose the death penalty on anyone who begins an email with "H...
Netflix Announces New Animated Film 'Bro-Country Demon Hunters' - Article image
Entertainment · Jul 18, 2026 · 41
Netflix Announces New Animated Film 'Bro-Country Demon Hunters'

U.S. - Hoping to piggyback off of their smash hit "K-Pop Demon Hunters," Netflix has announced a new animated film coming in fall 2026 entitled "Bro-C...

Subscriber Headlines

Due To Poor Air Quality, Chicago Advises Criminals To Commit Indoor Crimes

Jul 17, 2026 | PoliticalSatire


Trump Gets NATO Allies To Commit To Helping Replenish Depleted US Beer Supply

Jul 11, 2026 | jerickson


Taco Bell Introduces New Cyclospora Sauce Packets

Jul 16, 2026 | BrotherTim

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Iran Foils New Bombing Attack By Disguising Itself With A Giant 'Q' - Article image
Iran Foils New Bombing Attack By Disguising Itself With A Giant 'Q'
World · Jul 18, 2026 · 32
Plane Crashes After No One Tells The Passengers To 'Fly Safe' - Article image
Plane Crashes After No One Tells The Passengers To 'Fly Safe'
Travel · Jul 17, 2026 · 44
Christopher Nolan Criticized For Not Depicting Trojan Horse As Historically Accurate Large Wooden Rabbit - Article image
Christopher Nolan Criticized For Not Depicting Trojan Horse As Historically Accurate Large Wooden Rabbit
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Idaho Builds Border Wall Out Of Potatoes To Keep Out Californians - Article image
Idaho Builds Border Wall Out Of Potatoes To Keep Out Californians
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Brilliant Politician JD Vance Secures Vote Of 100% Of Nation’s Tucker Carlsons - Article image
Brilliant Politician JD Vance Secures Vote Of 100% Of Nation’s Tucker Carlsons
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Cockroach Maintains Composure Despite Making Contact With Journalist - Article image
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10 Rejected Titles For Biden’s New Memoir - Article image
Politics · Jul 15, 2026 · 177
10 Rejected Titles For Biden’s New Memoir

At long last, the wait is over - President Joe Biden has written a memoir about his time in the White House. The book, titled Promise Me, America, wil...
‪Hegseth Orders Any Military Personnel With Low Testosterone Be Transferred To The Navy‬ - Article image
U.S. · Jul 16, 2026 · 69
‪Hegseth Orders Any Military Personnel With Low Testosterone Be Transferred To The Navy‬

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Secretary of War Pete Hegseth issued a new order that any military member who is discovered to have low testosterone be immediately...
CNN Poll Shows 125% Of Americans Don’t Believe Trump’s Claim Of Election Fraud - Article image
Politics · Jul 17, 2026 · 57
CNN Poll Shows 125% Of Americans Don’t Believe Trump’s Claim Of Election Fraud

ATLANTA, GA - President Donald Trump's national address on election integrity may have fallen on deaf ears, according to a new CNN poll that shows 125...
Man Who Ate At Taco Bell Getting More Baja Blast Than He Bargained For - Article image
Health · Jul 17, 2026 · 46
Man Who Ate At Taco Bell Getting More Baja Blast Than He Bargained For

DOWNEY, CA - According to witnesses, a man eating at Taco Bell received quite a bit more Baja Blast than he had been counting on.

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Explosive Diarrhea Epidemic Traced To Gain-Of-Function Lab At Taco Bell Institute - Article image
Health · Jul 15, 2026 · 65
Explosive Diarrhea Epidemic Traced To Gain-Of-Function Lab At Taco Bell Institute

IRVINE, CA - Though initial reports indicated that the recent cyclosporiasis outbreak had happened naturally through people consuming produce contamin...
National Park Service Reminds Americans Not To Approach Bison, But If You Do, Make Sure Someone Captures A Hilarious Video Of It - Article image
Life · Jul 16, 2026 · 54
National Park Service Reminds Americans Not To Approach Bison, But If You Do, Make Sure Someone Captures A Hilarious Video Of It

U.S. - The U.S. National Park Service issued a reminder to avoid approaching the bison inside national parks, but if you do, to please be sure that so...
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids - Article image
Family · May 19, 2026 · 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids

OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
Trump To Secure Strait Of Hormuz By Posting Old Man Who Asks You 3 Questions Before You May Pass - Article image
World · Jul 15, 2026 · 87
Trump To Secure Strait Of Hormuz By Posting Old Man Who Asks You 3 Questions Before You May Pass

DOHA - With the U.S. blockade of the important waterway back on amid renewed hostilities in Iran, President Donald Trump announced that he would secur...

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Buc-ee's Announces First Gas Station in Space - Article image
Life · Jun 11, 2024 · 89
Buc-ee's Announces First Gas Station in Space

HOUSTON, TX - In what many are calling the "biggest advance of the 21st century," official Buc-ee's sources have confirmed that the legendary Texas-ba...
In Appeal To Millennial Voters, Kamala Says Trump Is Also Like Voldemort - Article image
In Appeal To Millennial Voters, Kamala Says Trump Is Also Like Voldemort
Politics · Oct 25, 2024 · 61
GOP: 'Man, We Were Gonna Defund Planned Parenthood But Now We Lost The House, Oh Well, Maybe Next Time' - Article image
GOP: 'Man, We Were Gonna Defund Planned Parenthood But Now We Lost The House, Oh Well, Maybe Next Time'
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Worship Drummer Throws Drumstick Out To Lucky Screaming Fan - Article image
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Uh Oh: Punxsutawney Phil Predicts 70 Years Of Exile In Babylon - Article image
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Reality Criticized For Not More Clearly Distinguishing Itself From Satire - Article image
Reality Criticized For Not More Clearly Distinguishing Itself From Satire
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Local Father Still Referring To Anything On The Internet As A 'Meme' - Article image
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How Was Church? June 15, 2026 Edition - Article image
Premium · Jun 15, 2026 · 69
How Was Church? June 15, 2026 Edition

Sunday is the best day of the week. The coffee tastes a little bit better when enjoyed with the people of the Lord. How was church for you yesterday? ...
It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring? - Article image
Premium · May 25, 2026 · 39
It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring?

Hey, Bee family!
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom - Article image
Premium · May 19, 2026 · 96
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom

As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492 - Article image
Premium · May 18, 2026 · 33
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492

Our crack team of certified fake news specialists work tirelessly every day to bring you fake news you can trust. We've shared before about how our te...

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Democrats Warn We Shouldn’t Reopen The Country Until We Can Be Safe From Trump Getting Credit For A Good Economy - Article image
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Politics · Apr 27, 2020 · 16
Starbucks Unveils New Satanic Holiday Cups - Article image
Starbucks Unveils New Satanic Holiday Cups
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Bernie Sanders Praises China For Eradicating Poverty By Killing All The Poor People - Article image
Bernie Sanders Praises China For Eradicating Poverty By Killing All The Poor People
Politics · Aug 28, 2019 · 30
Celebrities Show Solidarity With Protesters By Burning Their Own Homes To The Ground - Article image
Celebrities Show Solidarity With Protesters By Burning Their Own Homes To The Ground
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El Paso Man Comes Down From Insane Acid Trip Where He Hallucinated That He Ran For President - Article image
El Paso Man Comes Down From Insane Acid Trip Where He Hallucinated That He Ran For President
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CNN Publishes Real News Story For April Fools' Day - Article image
CNN Publishes Real News Story For April Fools' Day
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