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Canadian Grandma Excited To Hear Her Family Is Paying To Hire A MAID - Article image
World · May 27, 2026 · 55
Canadian Grandma Excited To Hear Her Family Is Paying To Hire A MAID

CALGARY - One elderly woman was convinced that her life was soon going to change forever, as the Canadian grandmother expressed excitement after heari...

Democrats Hopeful Average Texas Voter Wants To Ban Steak And Thinks God Is Gay - Article image
Politics · May 27, 2026 · 62
Democrats Hopeful Average Texas Voter Wants To Ban Steak And Thinks God Is Gay

TEXAS - With the field now set for the Texas Senate race, Democrats are hopeful that the average Texan voter wants to ban steak and believes God is ga...

SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters - Article image
Church · May 27, 2026 · 58
SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters

NASHVILLE, TN - The Southern Baptist Convention voted to adopt a new church policy on Wednesday where tasers can be used on visitors who try to sneak ...
'Jesus Never Said You Can't Do This!' Shouts James Talarico While Dropkicking Labradoodle
'Jesus Never Said You Can't Do This!' Shouts James Talarico While Dropkicking Labradoodle
'Jesus Never Said You Can't Do This!' Shouts James Talarico While Dropkicking Labradoodle - Featured article image
Scripture · May 27, 2026 · 51

AUSTIN, TX - Representative James Talarico was seen today gleefully dropkicking a labradoodle as he assured onlookers that Jesus had never explicitly ...

Oh No: Band Going To Play Something From New Album - Article image
Entertainment · May 27, 2026 · 51
Oh No: Band Going To Play Something From New Album

RED ROCKS, CO - Local concertgoers experienced a wave of dread Friday night when indie-rock front man Julian Vance announced the band was going to "pl...

Entertainment · May 27, 2026 · 51
Oh No: Band Going To Play Something From New Album

Oh No: Band Going To Play Something From New Album - Featured article image
RED ROCKS, CO - Local concertgoers experienced a wave of dread Friday night when indie-rock front man Julian Vance announced the band was going to "pl...
SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters - Article image
Church · May 27, 2026 · 58
SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters

NASHVILLE, TN - The Southern Baptist Convention voted to adopt a new church policy on Wednesday where tasers can be used on visitors who try to sneak ...

Subscriber Headlines

'Could Ye Not Watch With Me Three Hours?' Laments Husband As Wife Snoozes Through LOTR

May 20, 2026 | Tyroil Smoochie-Wallace


Democrats Celebrate Memorial Day By Burning American Flag

May 26, 2026 | Rabbit678


“And How Did This Quarter Get Behind Your Ear?” Asks Moses To Pharaoh’s Stunned Magicians

May 14, 2026 | BrotherTim

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White House Announces Iran Deal Completely Done Except For All The Important Parts - Article image
White House Announces Iran Deal Completely Done Except For All The Important Parts
Politics · May 27, 2026 · 34
Wife Says Her Love Language Is All Of Them And You're Going To Have To Guess Which One She Wants Today - Article image
Wife Says Her Love Language Is All Of Them And You're Going To Have To Guess Which One She Wants Today
Family · May 26, 2026 · 68
Tragedy: Multiple Trump Assassins Accidentally Shoot Each Other - Article image
Tragedy: Multiple Trump Assassins Accidentally Shoot Each Other
U.S. · May 26, 2026 · 65
Weird: High School Valedictorian Not Asian - Article image
Weird: High School Valedictorian Not Asian
Education · May 26, 2026 · 64
Noah Fined By HOA For Parking Boat In Driveway - Article image
Noah Fined By HOA For Parking Boat In Driveway
Scripture · May 26, 2026 · 56
Grok Responds To Pope Leo By Publishing List Of 95 Theses - Article image
Grok Responds To Pope Leo By Publishing List Of 95 Theses
Church · May 26, 2026 · 45

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Everyone In Chicago Shot Over The Weekend - Article image
Crime · May 26, 2026 · 74
Everyone In Chicago Shot Over The Weekend

CHICAGO, IL - The Chicago Police Department confirmed on Tuesday morning that every single resident of the city had been shot over the long holiday we...
Physicians At Walter Reed Confirm Trump's Midi-Chlorian Count Is Off The Charts - Article image
Politics · May 26, 2026 · 53
Physicians At Walter Reed Confirm Trump's Midi-Chlorian Count Is Off The Charts

BETHESDA, MD - Results from President Donald Trump's 6-month physical at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center appeared to show that his midi-c...
The Babylon Bee Has Obtained A Leaked Copy Of The Iran-U.S. Peace Deal - Article image
World · May 24, 2026 · 65
The Babylon Bee Has Obtained A Leaked Copy Of The Iran-U.S. Peace Deal

News broke this morning that the United States and Iran have agreed to the framework of a peace deal, and our investigative team here at The Babylon B...
Parents Help Graduate Sound Out The Words On Diploma - Article image
Education · May 26, 2026 · 50
Parents Help Graduate Sound Out The Words On Diploma

TUCSON, AZ - Parents of high school graduate David Simpson helped their son sound out the words on his diploma after the teen expressed frustration at...

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Chuck Schumer Celebrates Memorial Day Alone As All Of Last Year's Guests Dead From E. Coli - Article image
Politics · May 25, 2026 · 73
Chuck Schumer Celebrates Memorial Day Alone As All Of Last Year's Guests Dead From E. Coli

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Senator Chuck Schumer reportedly spent Memorial Day alone with his thoughts after having killed all of his backyard barbecue guests...
Review: 'The Mandalorian And Grogu' Is A Fun Enough Flick — But It Utterly Fails To Mention Anything About Freeing Palestine - Article image
Entertainment · May 25, 2026 · 38
Review: 'The Mandalorian And Grogu' Is A Fun Enough Flick — But It Utterly Fails To Mention Anything About Freeing Palestine

The first Star Wars feature film in seven years should have been a grand event. But from the moment the opening text rolled, it was clear something wa...
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids - Article image
Family · May 19, 2026 · 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids

OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
Boaz Carefully Arranges Stalks Of Grain On Ground To Spell Out ‘Hey Gurl’ - Article image
Scripture · May 25, 2026 · 46
Boaz Carefully Arranges Stalks Of Grain On Ground To Spell Out ‘Hey Gurl’

BETHLEHEM - As Ruth was about to come pick up extra crops left for her in the fields, workers reportedly spotted Boaz carefully arranging stalks of gr...

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Biden Campaign Holds Boat Parade But It's Just Biden Alone In A Paddleboat - Article image
Politics · Sep 17, 2020 · 87
Biden Campaign Holds Boat Parade But It's Just Biden Alone In A Paddleboat

WILMINGTON, DE - The Biden campaign has grown concerned with all the Trump flotillas happening nearly every weekend, gathering hundreds of enthusiasti...
Suspicious Package Mailed To Joel Osteen Found To Contain Bible - Article image
Suspicious Package Mailed To Joel Osteen Found To Contain Bible
Celebs · Oct 24, 2018 · 12
Biden Calls For $50 Billion To Help Ukraine Track Down Notorious Russian Arms Dealer - Article image
Biden Calls For $50 Billion To Help Ukraine Track Down Notorious Russian Arms Dealer
World · Dec 8, 2022 · 140
China Issues Stay-At-Home Order To Hong Kong To Prevent Spread Of Democracy - Article image
China Issues Stay-At-Home Order To Hong Kong To Prevent Spread Of Democracy
World · May 26, 2020 · 17
Modern-Day Job Refuses To Curse God Even After Three Hours Of Spotty Internet - Article image
Modern-Day Job Refuses To Curse God Even After Three Hours Of Spotty Internet
Christian Living · Aug 14, 2018 · 7
Atheists Turn Out In Droves For Fedora Giveaway Night At Angel Stadium - Article image
Atheists Turn Out In Droves For Fedora Giveaway Night At Angel Stadium
Sports · Aug 22, 2016 · 6
Evangelical Church Architect Fired For Suggesting Steeple - Article image
Evangelical Church Architect Fired For Suggesting Steeple
Church · Apr 23, 2026 · 40

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It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring? - Article image
Premium · May 25, 2026 · 36
It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring?

Hey, Bee family!
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom - Article image
Premium · May 19, 2026 · 78
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom

As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492 - Article image
Premium · May 18, 2026 · 31
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492

Our crack team of certified fake news specialists work tirelessly every day to bring you fake news you can trust. We've shared before about how our te...
Photo Caption Challenge Winner: Trump And The Bees Edition - Article image
Premium · May 5, 2026 · 47
Photo Caption Challenge Winner: Trump And The Bees Edition

Last week, we put out the challenge to our intrepid subscribers to caption this glorious photo of Trump with a bee. After sifting through the stack of...

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Hillary Clinton Asked To Leave Costco After Repeatedly Accusing Sample Lady Of Being A Russian Asset - Article image
Hillary Clinton Asked To Leave Costco After Repeatedly Accusing Sample Lady Of Being A Russian Asset
Politics · Oct 18, 2019 · 10
Senate To Be Replaced With Room Full Of Monkeys Throwing Feces - Article image
Senate To Be Replaced With Room Full Of Monkeys Throwing Feces
Politics · Sep 28, 2018 · 37
Biden Says He Can't Wait To Find Out Who He Picked For VP - Article image
Biden Says He Can't Wait To Find Out Who He Picked For VP
Politics · Aug 3, 2020 · 81
Disney CEO: 'To Avoid Filming Among Depraved, Immoral People, We Are Moving All Our Georgia Operations Back To Hollywood' - Article image
Disney CEO: 'To Avoid Filming Among Depraved, Immoral People, We Are Moving All Our Georgia Operations Back To Hollywood'
Entertainment · May 30, 2019 · 9
Bernie Sanders Criticizes Billionaire For Giving Money To Students Instead Of The Needy Federal Government - Article image
Bernie Sanders Criticizes Billionaire For Giving Money To Students Instead Of The Needy Federal Government
Politics · May 20, 2019 · 10
Bibles Pulled From Shelves For Outdated Idea That All Humans Are Of One Race And Made In The Image Of God - Article image
Bibles Pulled From Shelves For Outdated Idea That All Humans Are Of One Race And Made In The Image Of God
Scripture · Jun 12, 2020 · 32

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