WASHINGTON, D.C.—In what many are calling the most popular Executive Order of all time, President Trump has ordered public schools to stop teaching anti-American history classes, replacing them all with daily viewings of Top Gun, among other classic pro-America movies where the Russians and other foes get crushed by the greatest country in the world.
The initiative calls for the replacement of the "inaccurate and dumb" 1619 Project with the new "much cooler" "1986 Project" where kids just watch Top Gun all day.
"Schools brainwashing our kids with anti-American propaganda? Not on my watch," Trump told reporters. "Kids will now have a much more accurate picture of America and will grow up with a great image of how awesome our kick-[FLOWERBED] country is."
"Plus, frankly, the movie is just rad." Trump then started imitating the opening guitar licks while he played an air guitar.
Other movies included in the new curriculum include these classics, each of which Trump called a "fine, historically accurate, pro-America movie":
- Rocky IV
- Red Dawn
- The Patriot
- Independence Day
- Team America: World Police
- Air Force One
- Home Alone 2
- The Apprentice Season 1
Democrats were forced to condemn Top Gun after the announcement, saying they much prefer better '80s movies like Superman IV and Grease 2.