SENOIA, GA — Officials are reporting significantly reduced traffic volumes in the areas around Senoia today. A town spokesperson said this is due to a Biden rally happening downtown later this afternoon.
"Traffic volumes are way down today, pretty much across the board," said town spokeswoman Alison Smith. "We're reporting no delays on any area highways or side streets. Not a single car to be seen anywhere!"
"Honestly, I can't ever remember seeing anything like it," Smith continued. "There are fewer cars out there than during the first few days of the COVID shutdowns. The last time I saw our roads this clear was when they closed them completely to film those scenes for ‘The Walking Dead."
Local resident Matt Johnson is among those fleeing the city in droves to avoid being associated with the Biden rally. "I mean, it's not like I planned to go, but I figured it would look better if I were a few thousand miles away when [the rally] happens," Johnson noted. "Better to flee the state for a few days and risk losing my job than to be mistaken for a Biden supporter."
At publishing time, Smith said Atlanta officials have begun planning for a 600% increase in traffic for an upcoming Trump rally at Mercedes-Benz Stadium. "We've got 200,000 people camped out already, and the rally is still over a month away," she noted.
There's lots to be thankful for, libs!
