Study Confirms 100% Of Men Agree With Toby Keith That They Should've Been A Cowboy
Celebs · Feb 6, 2024 ·

PAULS VALLEY, OK — Following the passing of country music star Toby Keith, a new study confirmed that 100% of men agree with Keith that they should've been cowboys.

The study results, released shortly after the news broke of the singer's death, proved conclusively that Keith's hit song was absolutely correct and that all true men, no matter their social status or background, wish they would have become cowboys.

"It's surprisingly accurate," said investment banker Jack Sanderson. "I live very comfortably in a large house, I own my own private plane, I have a full-time staff to cook my meals and handle chores, I can pretty much buy anything I want, and my investment portfolio will have me sitting pretty for the rest of my life. But, man… I should've been a cowboy."

Some experts once scoffed at Keith's assertion that living a simple life on the range herding cattle and getting dirty while accomplishing an honest day's work would be ideal, but were forced to admit the veracity of the singer's claims. "I didn't think it was feasible, but Toby Keith was right," said Professor Philip Jenkins of The American Song Accuracy Foundation. "Our study indicates that every male, down to a man, would go back and become a cowboy if they could. The man wasn't just a chart-topping country singer. He was a prophet."

At publishing time, men around the world were reportedly honoring Keith by ditching their high-paying white-collar corporate jobs to move out to the open country, buy a pair of cowboy boots and make their living riding and roping.

When guns are finally banned in the coming utopia, you may still need to defend yourself on the rare occasion.

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