Sports
Nationals Disappointed To Learn Boos Don't Count As Runs

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Washington Nationals fans booed Trump as he made an appearance at Game 5 of the World Series this weekend.

The team got excited, assuming the boos would propel them to victory over the Houston Astros. Unfortunately, an MLB rep confirmed that the boos were not redeemable for runs, and the Nationals lost the game 7-1.

"We totally destroyed the Astros when it came to booing Trump," said one dejected fan. "But it was really weird. The game ended and the scoreboard still said that we lost, as though the booing of the president didn't count at all."

Washington, D.C. natives have filed an official complaint with the MLB, claiming that virtue-signaling about how bad the orange man is should count for runs.

"We're thinking something like one run for every decibel of incoherent screaming about the president," said Nationals coach David Martinez. "It would only be fair."

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