WASHINGTON, D.C.—Trump's military parade, complete with military service members, law enforcement, and tanks, got off to a peaceful, patriotic start Thursday. Americans cheered and waved small USA flags as the parade went by, their feelings of patriotism swelling up.
But the parade got "a little out of hand" an hour in, according to witnesses, as the military members marched through the city, boarded some cargo planes, crossed the Atlantic, and took over England.
As revelers cheered on the tanks and they neared the end of the parade run, they boarded a C-17, flew across the Atlantic, landed in London, and annexed the United Kingdom.
"You can't really blame them," Trump said, shrugging. "They got a little caught up in all the excitement. It happens sometimes. They were just going with the flow. Oh well. I guess we could use the small island country as a military base or something. Maybe a new Trump hotel or casino!"
At publishing time, the military parade had also taken over Canada, Mexico, and California.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.