U.S.—A new study found that the vast majority of Americans have absolutely no memory of a guy named "Pete Buttigieg" who allegedly ran for president earlier this year.
81% of those surveyed simply responded, "Who?" while 9% thought he was one of Jeff Dunham's puppets. 10% claimed that Buttigieg was the mayor of a small town in Indiana who ran for president on the Democratic ticket, but most sensible people agree that these people are insane.
Researchers claim that all evidence points to the fact that Pete Buttigieg exists. He has a Wikipedia page and everything. Still, many are skeptical. If he did run for president, it must have been a very long time ago.
"Anyone can edit Wikipedia and make up a wacky name like Buttigieg," said Dr. Al Parsons, head researcher. "It's clearly invented to try to fool people."
Snopes has rated the claim that Pete Buttigieg exists as "true," further solidifying the case that he never existed.
Researchers assured everyone, however, that if Buttigieg is real, then it's "a great mercy" that his memory has collectively been wiped from everyone's consciousness.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.