NEW ROCHELLE, NY — Former late-night talk show host Jay Leno had a wild and wacky ride on his most recent pogo stick excursion, according to sources. While navigating a staircase, Leno took a slip on a banana peel and bounced down 175 steps, ultimately landing on a cactus.
Leno explained that after recently suffering extreme burns from a garage fire and injuries from a motorcycle accident, he decided to try out his other hobby: extreme pogo-sticking on stairs with cactuses all around.
"Eh yeah, it's crazy, folks, what can I say? Just crazy! I've fallen down a few steps before, but this was something else," Leno said, picking cactus spines out of his skin. "One minute I was cruising down the staircase, the next I was bouncing down them like a pinball machine! How 'bout that folks?"
Despite the painful landing, Leno took the incident in stride, stating: "At least I can say I've landed on my feet and on a cactus!" In the distance, the sound of a rimshot was heard.
According to sources, Leno has said that he's learned his lesson and will be avoiding fires, motorcycles, pogo-sticks, and cactuses for good.
At publishing time, Leno was spotted rollerblading on the streets, crashing headfirst into a baker's freshly baked pie, falling into wet cement, and then being crushed by a precariously hanging grand piano.
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