German Health Minister: 'We Must Take Large Groups Of Unvaccinated And Concentrate Them Into Special Camps'
World · Dec 2, 2021 · BabylonBee.com

BERLIN - German Health Minister Jens Spahn has announced his aggressive plan to fight COVID, which will include gathering all the unvaccinated people and putting them in special secured areas where they won't bother anyone. 

"Ze key to fighting ze COVID iz very simple," said Spahn. "Ve must concentrate all ze filthy undesirables into special camps with very tall barbed-wire fences all around, where they will not infect us with their filthy anti-vaxx presence anymore." 

Unvaccinated Germans will also be required to wear highly-visible markings on their clothing, so everyone will know to stay away from them, or turn them in if they attempt to buy food in a public market.

"Zis iz for ze good of ze German people," continued Spahn. "Ve vill not tolerate zis disgusting unvaccinated in our presence anymore. Heil Science!" 

Spahn then gave a very special pro-science salute. 

Australia praised the move by the German Health Minister, saying it worked great for the Aborigines.

 

Babylon Bee subscriber Trevor Barrus contributed to this report. If you want to pitch your own headline ideas to our staff, click here to check out all of our membership options!

When guns are finally banned in the coming utopia, you may still need to defend yourself on the rare occasion.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more tactical instruction

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.