IRVING, TX — In a step toward greater inclusion, The Boy Scouts Of America announced this week that it will be just going by "Of" from here on out.
"We realized our name had a lot of problematic terms, like ‘Boy,' ‘Scouts,' and ‘America' in it," Scouting executive Tim Galbraith told reporters. "We decided ‘Of' was much more inclusive and pinpoints what scouting, I mean, um… ‘of-ing' really means. Go Of!"
Traditionally an all-boys organization designed to foster rugged, masculine patriotism and service in young men, scouting has come under fire in recent years for not including girls, trans-girls, trans-boys, and two-spirit genderqueer child drag queen polycules. Leaders say the name change showcases ‘Of's' commitment to transitioning itself from a beneficial program for young men into just another watered-down all-gender after-school program run by communist weirdos.
"We feel this is the best way to completely torpedo any remaining relevance scouting had," Galbraith said. "We're working on a whole new program aimed specifically at creating an inclusive, generic, all-gender environment sure to attract today's modern kids. Go ‘Of'!"
As of publishing time, ‘Of' had rebranded to just "--" after some people pointed out the word "of" is offensive to a remote tribe in Subsarahan Africa that goes by a similar name.
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