Target Unveils New Line Of Hamas Intifada Wear For Children
Economy · May 7, 2024 ·

MINNEAPOLIS, MN — In a show of support for anti-Israel protests on college campuses and other places across the country, retail giant Target unveiled a new line of Hamas intifada wear for children.

The new line is scheduled to arrive in stores in the coming weeks and will allow customers to outfit their toddlers, preschoolers, and grade school students in the latest fashion inspired by one of the world's most prominent Islamic terrorist organizations.

"Now your kids can join the war against the Jewish oppressors!" said Target marketing spokesperson Jen Grant. "From the rubble-strewn battlefields of Gaza to college campuses nationwide, everyone wants to look like the battle-hardened freedom fighters from Hamas — and your child can! At Target, we're committed to representing all people groups, especially those who want to annihilate the nation of Israel from existence. Check out the new Intifada line at your nearest Target today!"

Reaction from parents was mixed following the announcement. "I can't wait to get my little Colton his very own keffiyeh!" said one parent. "He'll be ready to protest and stand up to colonizers while chanting ‘Death to Israel' before you know it!" Others were not sold on the idea. "Not sure this should be marketed to kids," said concerned parent David Goldstein. "If I saw a kid wearing this stuff at my child's school, I'd be a little worried, to say the least."

At publishing time, Target was also preparing to introduce an exclusive line of "Campus Protester" Barbie dolls, complete with unwashed hair and misspelled protest signs.

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