NEW YORK, NY — In what political experts said could be the final nail in the coffin for the former president's bid to return to the White House, a former Blockbuster Video employee came forward to accuse Donald Trump of failing to return a rented VHS copy of Baby Geniuses in 1999.
The incident allegedly stemmed from a visit Trump made to a Blockbuster location in lower Manhattan years ago in search of the classic film featuring babies with computer-animated mouths. The former clerk of the store alleged Trump took the VHS tape and never returned it, disqualifying him from serving as president.
"Can anyone still vote for him with a clear conscience after hearing about this?" asked former Blockbuster employee Phil Jergens. "I saw it happen. I was there. It was 1999… such a great year for movies. I distinctly remember Donald Trump walking into the store on a Friday night and asking for Baby Geniuses. He said he had seen it five times already but couldn't get enough of it. He rented it that night and he never returned it. I think all these MAGA voters need to ask themselves if this is the type of person they want leading their country."
When asked for comment on the allegations, Trump was adamant that he had returned the tape on time. "Another witch hunt from the desperate Democrats," he told reporters. "It's sad. Very sad. I took the movie back to Blockbuster three days later. And I rewound it… you've got to rewind the tapes, folks. Heck of a movie. Baby Geniuses. They're like little people with their mouths moving and everything. I still don't know how they did it. Incredible technology."
At publishing time, the Justice Department had officially indicted Trump on multiple counts of renting awful movies.
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