MENLO PARK, CA - Facebook made waves this week after announcing they would temporarily be lifting their ban on calls to violence as long as the violence is directed towards Russians. Now in an exciting new update, Facebook will allow users to directly commit actual violence against Russian people with a new "call in drone strike" button.
"As leaders in the tech industry, it's very important to use our vast and terrifying power to connect people, disseminate trustworthy information, and sometimes kill people we think need to be killed," said CEO Mark Zuckerberg. "Since our entire culture decided overnight it's ok to hate Russian people now, we want our users to be able to join in that hatred together. That's why we're proud to add this cool new 'drone strike' button!"
Clicking on the "call in drone strike" button will immediately signal one of Facebook's 10,000 brand-new predator drones to track down and blow up the Russian of your choice. Users with successful kills will receive a special edition Ukraine flag icon to display on their profile.
Facebook has said they will keep the changes in place until the next international hysteria gives everyone a new group of people to hate.
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