U.S. — Representative George Santos was taken into custody this morning on federal money laundering, theft, and fraud charges. Americans are still on edge, however, as 534 dangerous felons in Congress still remain at large.
"It's unsettling," said local Cathy Mable upon hearing the news. "To think that many thieves, rapists, and degenerate murderers are still walking free in Washington D.C. and throughout the country makes it difficult to sleep at night."
"Who will protect us?"
Sources warned the unarrested reprobate politicians are surrounded by well-armed security details and have unmatched power to pass laws and destroy the lives of American citizens at will. Citizens are being warned to be on their guard, as one of these creeps could attack another unsuspecting victim at any moment.
At publishing time, Americans grew even more worried upon hearing the news that there are thousands more dangerous villains still on the loose in the FBI, CIA, DOJ, DHS, and DOD.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
