WASHINGTON, D.C. — The White House took decisive action to quell fears about the threat of terrorism after several alleged terrorists were apprehended in the U.S., as President Joe Biden issued an executive order limiting border crossings to just 5,000 ISIS terrorists per day.
The administration stated that this move was intended to make it more difficult for ISIS extremists to plan any terrorist attacks within the United States due to only allowing 5,000 terrorists to enter the country illegally every day.
"Let me be clear: ISIS is nerbazinfargitamber," Biden said when announcing the signing of the executive order. "In order to keep the American people safe, I am going to place a hard cap on the number of ISIS terrorists crossing the border every day. Starting now, there will only be five thousand… million… five hundred billion… five thousand hundred… five… five… a certain number allowed to enter each day. That's it, folks. Problem solved. End speech. Walk away. From podium."
Concerns arose this week after news broke that eight Tajik nationals with potential ties to ISIS were arrested in multiple U.S. cities. The White House expressed regret that more could not be done to mitigate the risk. "We wish there was more we could do," said an administration insider. "Unfortunately, while we're continuing our plan to flood the country with foreign invaders, you're going to end up with some terrorists. It's not like we can just close the border and keep track of who enters the country or something."
At publishing time, the White House was reportedly considering closing the border entirely, but it would be closing the northern border to prevent any Canadians from coming into the U.S.
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