U.S.—April has officially been named "Bring Your Children to Work Month." The new holiday lets you work remotely as your children crawl all over you and scream in the background as you try to get some work done.
Millions of workers across the country have been celebrating the holiday for many weeks now.
Lots of employees have been harassed by their new, tiny coworkers. "Despite repeated warnings, my two workplace associates continued to touch my face, grab my leg, scream at the top of their lungs while I'm on a video call, and demand that I feed them throughout the day," said local man James Kerber. "Besides, the small talk is terrible -- all anyone ever talks about around the water cooler anymore is Peppa Pig. It's like, watch some Breaking Bad or something."
The man says they even burst into his office completely nude from time to time, bang on the door while he's in the bathroom, and hit him in his private area with baseball bats and other toys.
If Bring Your Children to Work Month is a big success, it will be expanded through May and maybe even into the summer.