Talk show host Steven Colbert signed off this week after CBS aired his final episode of The Late Show, leaving him on the hunt for his next professional endeavor. But what will he do next?
The Babylon Bee is here to offer the following list of new jobs that would be perfect for him:
Pharmaceutical Salesman: He has a natural gift for pushing drugs on the public.
Town Crier: Who says you need a TV show to scream about Trump all day?
MSNBC News Anchor: He wouldn't even need to change anything.
Freelance Show-Ruiner: There's no reason for him to limit himself to killing just one long-running program.
Knight at Medieval Times: He may not be that qualified, but everyone would love to see him get whacked with a mace a few times.
Screenwriter for anything other than Lord of the Rings movies: Just write anything else. Please.
Kleenex Tester: Finally, a good use for all the liberal tears.
Public Relations Director for the Democratic Party: He's already got over a decade of experience.
Schoolteacher: A perfect fit for someone well-versed in lecturing people about the evils of Donald Trump.
Comedian: It's a total departure from what he's used to, but it's worth a shot.
Don't worry, Steve. Your show may be dead, but once you land one of the jobs listed above, the best is yet to come. What other roles would be a great fit for Colbert? Post your thoughts in the comments.
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