WASHINGTON, D.C. — The nation came away reassured after the transcript from Special Counsel Hur demonstrated that President Biden can make car sounds with his mouth.

"Wow. Biden's still got it, folks," said MSNBC analyst Joe Scarborough. "Listen this quote here: 'Cars go vroom! Vroom, bbbrrraaa-vroom!' We can put any questions left about his mental fitness to rest."

According to the transcript, Biden demonstrated his remarkable ability to make car noises in response to a question about the location of improperly stored classified documents. "Yes, that's a really great corvette sound, sir," read the response of Special Counsel Hur. "No, you're absolutely right, it has more of a 'boom' sound when it starts. It's just that I asked your name and the date, so I was wondering...okay, now we're on to motorcycle noises."

Democrats have pointed to the transcript as a complete repudiation of Special Counsel Hur's description of Biden as a man with a poor memory. "The transcript clearly shows that Biden had to be reminded twice by other people what year his son died, but he never said the wrong year," explained Scarborough. "Boy does Special Counsel Hur have egg on his face now!"

At publishing time, Representative Thomas Massie had spent his entire time questioning the Special Counsel asking for more car noise demonstrations, just for funsies.