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Olympics Bans All Balls From Women's Sports - Article image
Sports · Mar 26, 2026 · 69
Olympics Bans All Balls From Women's Sports

LAUSANNE - In a landmark statement intended to simultaneously clarify lingering questions regarding trans athletes in events and prevent any potential...

Child Psychologists Now Say Screen Time Is OK For Toddlers As Long As You're Showing Them 'Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World' - Article image
Family · Mar 26, 2026 · 40
Child Psychologists Now Say Screen Time Is OK For Toddlers As Long As You're Showing Them 'Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World'

BETHESDA, MD - A leading group of child psychologists suggested screen time is now considered "OK" for toddlers as long as you are showing them the hi...

Jimmy Kimmel To Write Script For New 'Godfather' Sequel - Article image
Entertainment · Mar 26, 2026 · 58
Jimmy Kimmel To Write Script For New 'Godfather' Sequel

LOS ANGELES, CA - In a special joint announcement with legendary filmmaker Francis Ford Coppola, late-night talk show host Jimmy Kimmel revealed that ...
Iran Denies Negotiating With Trump As All Its Leaders Are Dead
Iran Denies Negotiating With Trump As All Its Leaders Are Dead
Iran Denies Negotiating With Trump As All Its Leaders Are Dead - Featured article image
World · Mar 26, 2026 · 50

TEHRAN - Iranian spokesman Ahmadi Mohammadi issued a strongly worded statement to "The Great Satan" in which he vehemently denied that ongoing negotia...

Theologians Confirm Heaven's Streets Of Gold Will Have No Cyclists - Article image
Theology · Mar 26, 2026 · 40
Theologians Confirm Heaven's Streets Of Gold Will Have No Cyclists

WORLD - The world's leading theologians weighed in on the nature of Heaven this week, confirming what many have long believed: Heaven's streets of gol...

Theology · Mar 26, 2026 · 40
Theologians Confirm Heaven's Streets Of Gold Will Have No Cyclists

Theologians Confirm Heaven's Streets Of Gold Will Have No Cyclists - Featured article image
WORLD - The world's leading theologians weighed in on the nature of Heaven this week, confirming what many have long believed: Heaven's streets of gol...
Jimmy Kimmel To Write Script For New 'Godfather' Sequel - Article image
Entertainment · Mar 26, 2026 · 58
Jimmy Kimmel To Write Script For New 'Godfather' Sequel

LOS ANGELES, CA - In a special joint announcement with legendary filmmaker Francis Ford Coppola, late-night talk show host Jimmy Kimmel revealed that ...

Subscriber Headlines

Iran's Present To Trump Revealed To Be LEGO Imperial Star Destroyer

Mar 24, 2026 | The Bat-Knight


Christian Woman Freezes Meals For Atheist Family For When Rapture Comes

Mar 25, 2026 | Twoplus2isChicken


Kier Starmer Announces Anyone Who Says Britain Doesn’t Have Free Speech Will Be Arrested

Mar 15, 2026 | BaberahamLincoln

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Bible Receives Modern Update With 'Morally Gray Edition' - Article image
Bible Receives Modern Update With 'Morally Gray Edition'
Church · Mar 26, 2026 · 47
Man Unsure If What's Missing In His Life Is Jesus Or Really Cool Jacket - Article image
Man Unsure If What's Missing In His Life Is Jesus Or Really Cool Jacket
Life · Mar 25, 2026 · 76
Hobbit On Diet Cuts Back To Four Meals A Day - Article image
Hobbit On Diet Cuts Back To Four Meals A Day
Health · Mar 25, 2026 · 38
Mysterious Investor 'Pancy_Nelosi' Makes Millions On Oil Trade Minutes Before Trump’s Iran Announcement - Article image
Mysterious Investor 'Pancy_Nelosi' Makes Millions On Oil Trade Minutes Before Trump’s Iran Announcement
Economy · Mar 25, 2026 · 43
Local Couple Enjoys Romantic Two-Week Honeymoon In TSA Line - Article image
Local Couple Enjoys Romantic Two-Week Honeymoon In TSA Line
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Chicago White Sox Improve Playoff Chances By Switching To WNBA - Article image
Chicago White Sox Improve Playoff Chances By Switching To WNBA
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7 Ways To Toughen Up Your Wimpy Kid - Article image
Sponsored · Mar 25, 2026 · 73
7 Ways To Toughen Up Your Wimpy Kid

Kids these days. They're pushovers. Back in the old days, every kid knew how to work, fight, and smoke tobacco. How can parents today recapture that t...
Soldiers Issued Crocs So Trump Can Say He Didn't Put Boots On The Ground - Article image
U.S. · Mar 25, 2026 · 74
Soldiers Issued Crocs So Trump Can Say He Didn't Put Boots On The Ground

IRAN - The Pentagon has issued Crocs to the 82nd Airborne Division in order to allow President Trump to truthfully say that he has not put any boots o...
Guy Who Pushed Over Reacher's Motorcycle Announces Plan To Shoot John Wick's Dog - Article image
Entertainment · Mar 25, 2026 · 62
Guy Who Pushed Over Reacher's Motorcycle Announces Plan To Shoot John Wick's Dog

BRENTWOOD, TN - The man who pushed over Jack Reacher's motorcycle and was subsequently pounded into the ground has announced that he will next go shoo...
Airport Wait Times Eliminated After TSA Checkpoints Taken Over By Chick-Fil-A - Article image
U.S. · Mar 24, 2026 · 67
Airport Wait Times Eliminated After TSA Checkpoints Taken Over By Chick-Fil-A

U.S. - Chick-fil-A employees began taking over TSA duties at the beginning of the week, and airline passengers noted that wait times were eliminated a...

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CNN Calls War For Iran - Article image
Media · Mar 23, 2026 · 96
CNN Calls War For Iran

U.S. - CNN announced a shift in its reporting of the US-Israel war with Iran on Monday, declaring the conflict resolved. In light of this major update...
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child - Article image
Sponsored · Dec 15, 2021 · 174
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child

First off, congratulations on raising a child already versed in progressive ideals! Your Christmas holiday is sure to be filled with joy, laughter, fe...
Terrorists Give Up After Three Hours In TSA Line - Article image
U.S. · Mar 24, 2026 · 32
Terrorists Give Up After Three Hours In TSA Line

NEW YORK, NY - A terrorist became frustrated and decided the attack he had been planning wasn't worth the trouble after spending three hours in the TS...
Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Claims It Was A Different Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Who Shot That Guy - Article image
Crime · Mar 24, 2026 · 81
Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Claims It Was A Different Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Champion Who Shot That Guy

LA PLATA, MD - The alleged perpetrator of a violent crime publicly voiced his innocence in what he said was a case of mistaken identity, as a quadrupl...

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Confused Biden Wondering Why Corn Pop Is At The White House - Article image
Politics · Apr 7, 2022 · 101
Confused Biden Wondering Why Corn Pop Is At The White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Biden was bewildered on Monday when his old arch-enemy Corn Pop was spotted at the White House during an event celebratin...
Rookie Move: Non-Giver Makes Eye Contact With Church Usher - Article image
Rookie Move: Non-Giver Makes Eye Contact With Church Usher
Church · Nov 6, 2018 · 12
Dems Switch Out Kamala For A Wheel Of Cheese With A Sign Reading 'Not Trump' - Article image
Dems Switch Out Kamala For A Wheel Of Cheese With A Sign Reading 'Not Trump'
Politics · Oct 18, 2024 · 89
Chicago Sports Fan Glad White Sox Are Almost Done And Oh No Now It's Bears Season - Article image
Chicago Sports Fan Glad White Sox Are Almost Done And Oh No Now It's Bears Season
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'The View' Will Now Just Be One Hour Of Hosts Beating White Women With Sticks - Article image
'The View' Will Now Just Be One Hour Of Hosts Beating White Women With Sticks
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Local Dad Manages To Change Diaper With Mere 427 Wipes - Article image
Local Dad Manages To Change Diaper With Mere 427 Wipes
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Unfortunate Wardrobe Malfunction Causes 7 Bags Of Weed To Fall Out Of Snoop Dogg's Costume - Article image
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New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims - Article image
Premium · Mar 12, 2026 · 25
New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims

Muslims are in the news this week after two Pennsylvania teenagers crossed into New York City for what could have been a normal day enjoying the city ...
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test - Article image
Premium · Mar 12, 2026 · 31
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test

Do you think you can guess the terrorist in this thumbnail? If so, you are a racist. Unconscious bias is a type of systematically deeply integrated so...
New Video - News Media Successfully Avoids Reporting News - Article image
Premium · Mar 10, 2026 · 30
New Video - News Media Successfully Avoids Reporting News

Secret Service interrupts the most handsome President of the United States of America in the world to share some explosive news - unfortunately, it's ...
New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader - Article image
Premium · Mar 5, 2026 · 49
New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader

The Iranian government has officially announced a successor to Ayatollah Khamenei, introducing today the new Supreme Leader - wait, they have now anno...

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Hillary Clinton Releases DNA Test Results Proving She's Only Half Lizard Person
Politics · Oct 15, 2018 · 21
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Government Accidentally Shuts Itself Down With Ban On Non-Essential Businesses
Politics · Mar 26, 2020 · 28
Walmart Now Requires All Shoppers To Wear Pants - Article image
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Bible Experts Determine Goliath Died Of COVID-19 - Article image
Bible Experts Determine Goliath Died Of COVID-19
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CNN Uncovers Evidence Hero Dog Sniffed Dozens Of Butts Back In College - Article image
CNN Uncovers Evidence Hero Dog Sniffed Dozens Of Butts Back In College
World · Oct 28, 2019 · 16

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