The Babylon Bee
Tech
· Nov 12, 2026
· 18
National Productivity Skyrockets After Microsoft Teams Goes Down
U.S. - National productivity skyrocketed on Thursday after Microsoft Teams went down, affording millions of Americans the rare opportunity to actually...
Culture
· Nov 12, 2026
· 42
Batman Exchanges Utility Belt For More Convenient Bat-Cargo Pants
GOTHAM CITY - According to sources, the Batman has exchanged his famous utility belt for more convenient bat-cargo pants.
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· Nov 11, 2026
· 68
11 Things You Should Go Enjoy One Last Time Before The Dems Institute A Communist State
The end is officially near, as Democrats' midterm wins have swept them back into power, giving America - and indeed freedom itself - mere days left to...
World
· Nov 10, 2026
· 122
Is Your Girlfriend Actually A Chinese Spy? Know The Signs
We've all been there, men. You're waiting in line outside GameStop, minding your own business, when a gorgeous Chinese woman walks up and asks you to ...
Politics
· Nov 11, 2026
· 39
Republicans Announce Plan To Do Exact Same Thing And Expect Different Results
WASHINGTON, D.C. - With the midterm elections now over and the nation's capital preparing for the incoming Democratic control of the legislative branc...
Worldviews
· Nov 11, 2026
· 56
Baby Relieved He Made It Out Of The Womb Before Democrats Won Midterms
OVERLAND PARK, KS - A local baby was relieved to have narrowly avoided life-threatening danger last month by making it out of his mother's womb before...
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Life
· Nov 11, 2026
· 37
Taco Bell Employee Fired For Passing Drug Test
ANAHEIM, CA - What had looked to be a promising career in the food service industry was abruptly cut short on Wednesday, as a local Taco Bell employee...
Politics
· Nov 10, 2026
· 58
Republicans Glad To Now Have Excuse For Not Getting Anything Done
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Contrary to popular belief, Republican lawmakers are reportedly glad that they lost the election because now they will have an excu...
Scripture
· Nov 9, 2026
· 69
11 More Foods Esau Would Have Traded His Birthright For
Jacob's brother, Esau, famously traded away his birthright for a bowl of stew. That's right, stew. Nothing special, right? But there were reportedly s...
Theology
· Nov 10, 2026
· 63
Theologians Announce That All Of Creation Declares The Glory Of God Except For New Jersey
U.S. - Theologians have clarified that all of creation does declare the glory of God, but with the notable exception of New Jersey.
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Premium
· Nov 11, 2026
· 72
Happy Veterans Day - A Thank You From The Bee
Happy Veterans Day, Bee family!
Premium
· Nov 10, 2026
· 51
DC Releases Improved Cut Of 'Supergirl' Where They Just Removed The Whole Movie And Replaced It With 'The Princess Bride'
Here's an article we wrote up but held off on publishing since the news cycle had already moved on from 'Supergirl.' Here it is as a Bonus Article for...
Premium
· Nov 9, 2026
· 92
Subscriber Polls: Why Did The Republicans Lose The Midterms In A Blue Tsunami?
Well it looks like last week's midterm election may result in a Senate with at least 54 Democrat senators and a House with at least 254 Democrat repre...
Premium
· Nov 6, 2026
· 25
The Babylon Bee Weekly Roundup | November 6, 2026
It's been quite the week, but Friday has arrived at last! That means it's once again time for The Babylon Bee's Weekly Roundup - here are the biggest ...
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