WORLD—The entire planet has reportedly given their lives to Christ immediately upon hearing that there will be no politics whatsoever in Heaven.
“You mean no political parties, no propaganda, and no elections in Heaven?!” said local man Clay Jones with visible confusion. “If that’s the case then I will lay my life down right now and follow Christ!”
Others were similarly overjoyed by this announcement of good, spin-free news. “Listen man, that’s cool and all that there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, but you had me at zero politics!”
Every person both rich and poor, young and old has received the promise that those in heaven will live in complete harmony under the sovereign reign and perfect peace of their creator God. They were informed that they would be His people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God.
All were dumbfounded by these promises and instantly repented once they heard they would be forever surrounded by His glory, and live by His words that are always trustworthy and true.
At publishing time, the entire globe had erupted with exuberant praises of joy and shouts of “Hallelujah”!