VENTURA, CA — A local wife and shades-aficionado lost her sunglasses Monday, then found them, then lost them, then found them, then finally…lost them again. Wait a minute, there they are.
Cami Monson says she's great at remembering where she puts them down, eventually. "I came in from the garage and set them on the kitchen counter. Or was it the computer desk? Oh! Here they are! In the fridge under a bag of lettuce."
Cami's husband Mark confirmed the discovery of said sunglasses and admits most of his life is spent waiting for his wife to find her glasses before they leave the house.
"I downloaded a Tetris app on my phone and I spend a lot of time playing it in the car waiting for Cami to find her glasses, keys, and chapstick," Mark told reporters. "Last week I waited for 23 minutes and observed her pick up her glasses, put them down on the hood of the car, and then walk off to find them again. It was impressive, actually."
Cami has made numerous plans for ways to never lose her glasses again, like always setting them in the same place every time she enters the house, but it turns out that most of the time she can't remember where that permanent place is.
"I always put them on the nightstand in my room. Or is it next to the sink in the bathroom? OH! Here they are! In the bowl with the bananas on the kitchen counter. Why didn't I look there first?!"
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
