WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the Supreme Court hearing arguments today over birthright citizenship, President Trump cleverly snuck his way onto the bench by disguising himself as Justice Sonia Sotomayor.
No one was the wiser as Trump settled into Sotomayor's seat, offering his adjacent justices a hearty "Ola! Como estas?"
"Oh, hey Sonia," said Justice Jackson, taking her seat. "Estoy bien, or whatever. Do you want some of my goldfish crackers?"
According to witnesses in the courtroom, the disguised Trump repeatedly coughed "WRONG" or "BULLCRAP" as the counsel argued in favor of birthright citizenship. Multiple delays occurred as Trump started "the wave" around the courtroom and fired a t-shirt cannon into the crowd.
"Who out there wants to end birthright citizenship? Let me hear youuuuu!" shouted Trump, launching prizes to whatever part of the gallery cheered the loudest. "Dónde está la biblioteca? Woo!!!"
At publishing time, the other justices had become suspicious when Trump began doing his signature dance during oral arguments.
Do you think you can guess which one is the terrorist?
