Trump Completely Obliterates Prosecution With Timely Use Of Reverse Card
U.S. · May 8, 2024 ·

NEW YORK — Donald Trump dealt a decisive blow to the prosecution this week in his ongoing hush money trial after expertly playing a Reverse card from the witness stand.

"Reverse!" Trump yelled excitedly. "Perfectly timed, as always. With a red card no less, my absolute favorite. Now, I get to ask the questions."

Court transcripts reveal District Attorney Alvin Bragg quickly objected, claiming that the defendant cannot play an UNO card in a court of law, but Judge Merchan wouldn't hear of it. "Overruled, counselor," Judge Merchan had replied. "UNO is a sacred game. I will not have it besmirched in my courtroom."

The state's case against the former president is now in shambles. According to legal experts, it is unlikely the prosecution can recover from such a dramatic setback. Trump's legal team has expressed gratitude for the president's quick thinking, though they are now concerned Trump may demand his money back since they've done very little to help him throughout the trial. "We're really just at the mercy of Trump's genius," said defense attorney Susan Necheles. "He's playing UNO while we're playing Go Fish, metaphorically speaking. Also, literally speaking."

Trump spoke briefly outside the courtroom following the day's proceedings. "Everyone's always asking me, 'What do you have up your sleeve?' It's an UNO card, people. And not just any UNO card — the best UNO card in the entire game. Some people say draw four is better, but that's fake news, to tell you the truth."

At publishing time, DA Alvin Bragg threw his worthless law degree in the trash.

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