PALM BEACH, FL — Amid increasing criticism that "Ron DeSanctimonious" is a terrible nickname for Florida governor and possible Presidential rival Ron DeSantis, former President Donald Trump has taken to ChatGPT to help him with brainstorming for better DeSantis nicknames.
"These are all better than ‘Ron DeSanctimonious – I should have come here sooner!" In a rare display of teachability, former President Trump told aides several of the AI-generated nickname contenders which included the following:
- Rotten Ron
- DeSaster
- Wrong Way Ron
- Ron De-Science
- Wee Little Ronny
- DemonSantis
- Ron DeSuckIt
- Neocon Ron
- Three-Finger Puddin' Ron
- Imitation Don Ron
- Fat Ron
- Ron DeNasty
- Ron DeSatan
- Ron DeLoser
- Ding-Dong Ron
- Ron-tard
- wRong Choice Ron
- FatFace Ron
- Squattie Ronnie
- Boots McGee
- Low Polls Ronnie
- Ronas Iscariot
- Ron DePanties
- Ron DeSadsack
- Tiny Hands Ron
- Small Hand Ron
- Wrong Ron Silver
- Short-Tie DeSantis
- Ronald McDonald
- That Guy From Florida
- Three-Fingered Ron
- Sloppy Ron
- No-Spoon Ron
- Sloppy Slob Ron
At publishing time, the former President had reportedly stormed into his office and logged onto TRUTH Social, after which staffers reported hearing the ominous ‘click' of his caps lock being activated.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
