Youth groups were the tightest place to be in the '90s. Did you go to one religiously back then? Know the warning signs:
-You still know all the lyrics to every single "Silly Songs with Larry" and sing "The Hairbrush Song" every time you're looking for a hairbrush.
-You remember when all the CCM musicians were Christians.
-You still have no idea what to do when someone of the opposite sex comes in for a front-hug
-Your dad still has his old Promise Keeper's shirt.
-Whenever everyone leaves the house for a bit you still kind of have this weird fear that you missed the Rapture.
-You learned the most important life lessons from Adventures in Odyssey
-You got saved at Beach Week. Again.
-You still have that old bottle of Sun-In from beach week in your drawer.
-Whenever someone mentions "rap music" you think of Carman or the rap verse of "Jesus Freak".
-You still don't have any hair on the place where your WWJD bracelet wore it all off.
-You start all dates with wacky icebreaker games like Chubby Bunny or Sardines.
-Tommy Girl perfume will forever be associated with the time Amber Evans asked to look off your Bible because she forgot hers.
-You still kind of regret burning all your Magic the Gathering cards and secular CDs.
-You thought listening to Audio Adrenaline was edgy, and your big rebellion in high school was listening to MXPX.
-You were shocked when Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ was nothing like the flannelgraph version
-You're still suspicious that anyone named Nicolae might be the antichrist.
-You make references to McGee & Me but no one understands what the fudge you're talking about.
-You think Five Iron Frenzy was way better than all those lame secular ska bands. And you're pretty sad they're all commies now.
-You had a dope military-themed Bible cover so reading the eternal Word of God would seem cool and hip.
-You learned guitar to get on the worship band just to impress Staci in the 10th grade.
-You still have doubts that you committed your life to Jesus enough times.
Do these signs describe you? Get help today.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
