NEW MEXICO — The government-funded Black Mesa Research Facility is currently in danger of being shut down after being hit with yet another OSHA violation.
The facility, which conducts advanced scientific and technological research, was reportedly cited for several safety violations that could endanger employees. A lab simply marked "Anomalous Materials" will be required to update signage to be less vague, ensuring the safety of all personnel.
An OSHA compliance safety and health officer noted, "There are large acid pits that seemingly serve no purpose with no safety railings of any kind. I dropped five clipboards down there."
Among the numerous other violations noted were the improper storage of ammunition crates and explosive barrels (often next to each other), insufficient safety rails, inadequate safety protocols for dealing with equipment malfunctions, high-powered lasers without proper shielding, and elevators lacking state certification.
The Black Mesa Research Facility was reportedly given 30 days to comply with the OSHA report, or it will be shut down and have its government contracts terminated. "There's a giant room with conveyor belts with absolutely no fall protection that run directly over vats of radioactive waste, with no barriers to prevent spills or exposure," said one OSHA officer. "I've never seen anything like it in my life."
At publishing time, before the Black Mesa Research Facility could be shut down, it was raided by military forces and destroyed by the detonation of a nuclear warhead for reasons unknown.
Woke Jesus is back with a new collection of socialist teachings for your edification.
