WEST HILLS, CA — Local 15-year-old girl Anna Brown recently underwent gender reassignment surgery to become a trans boy named Andre Brown. Unfortunately, she's now feeling let down by Demi Lovato, who inspired her to get the surgery in the first place.
"Wait — Demi is using she/her pronouns again? Are you kidding?" said the distraught young girl after her double mastectomy. "She just went back to being a girl? She was my idol! She inspired me to get this stupid surgery in the first place! What am I supposed to do now?"
Sources say Anna is just one of the thousands of girls in the International Demi Lovato Fan Club who were inspired by the pop star's bravery to change their genders, pronouns, and body chemistry.
"I've made a terrible mistake," said Anna on social media, prompting hundreds of death threats from the trans community for her blatant transphobia.
The gender clinic that performed the surgery was reached for comment, prompting them to release a statement saying: "No refunds. All sales are final."
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
