Supreme Court To Hear Historic 'Sloppy Wet V. Unforeseen Kiss' Case
U.S. · Jun 26, 2017 · BabylonBee.com

WASHINGTON, DC - The Supreme Court has agreed to hear a historic case covering a bitter dispute between the use of the "unforeseen kiss" and "sloppy wet kiss" lyrics in John Mark McMillan's hit worship song "How He Loves Us," sources confirmed Monday.

Coming out of the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals, the case revolves around the controversial replacement of the original "sloppy wet kiss" lyric with the slightly less awkward term "unforeseen" by a new worship leader at a church in Dallas. The worship leader, Mike Bundy, 28, had reportedly attempted to quietly replace the lyric "without raising a fuss," but was caught red-handed by die-hard devotees of the song, who reported him to federal authorities.

A federal prosecutor immediately charged Bundy with song tampering, and the case has slowly made its way through the federal court system before finally appearing before the highest court in the land.

Bundy, the defendant in Sloppy Wet v. Unforeseen Kiss, said through a lawyer he's confident the Supreme Court justices will find the revolting imagery inherent in the term "sloppy wet" to be unacceptable for use in worship music. Meanwhile, federal prosecutors are determined to hold Bundy accountable for allegedly tampering with McMillan's lyrics by introducing a "neutered" version of the line.

"I just love the rawness of that lyric," the U.S. attorney on the case told reporters. "I feel so authentic when I just belt that line out, about heaven meeting earth in a sloppy, messy manner, like when your great aunt kisses you at Thanksgiving."

"'Unforeseen' just isn't the same," he added.

The Court is slated to begin hearing arguments immediately after their lengthy summer break.


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