U.S. — According to sources, your Supercuts hairstylist just entered a back room and flipped a coin to decide whether to give you a surprisingly good haircut or the most atrocious haircut of all time.
"Hmmm, should I make this guy look good? Or should I completely ruin his week by absolutely butchering this haircut beyond all hope of repair?" asked the hairstylist to herself, according to sources, before flipping a coin in the air.
"Hee hee hee! This job is so fun!"
Experts say you regularly frequent this particular Supercuts location since it's close, cheap, and a thrilling surprise each time as to whether you'll look halfway decent, or be an unlovable troll for the next month or so. Experts also say you're too introverted to speak up if your haircut is bad and too lazy to find a new place.
The hairstylist is now making a ton of small talk about her kids and the weather, which is making you worry she's not paying attention to what she's doing.
At publishing time, the haircut had turned out fine, you guessed.
UPDATE: Upon arriving home you have realized the haircut was not at all fine and is in fact terrible.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
