SAN DIEGO, CA — Makers of the world's most popular baseball video game announced that the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence have been selected to appear on the cover of the newest franchise installment, MLB The Show 24.
"We'll give you a ‘show' alright!" said Sister Agatha Rumproast after the announcement was made. "We are absolutely giddy to accept the invitation to make the video game more liberated, uninhibited, and wild than it has ever been before! Get ready, gamers, and bring your gloves and bats -- because we're bad girls!"
The group will make history as the first non-athletes to appear on the game's cover, however sources say the satanic drag nuns will be playable characters within the game. Although slow around the bases in their outfits, the nuns will have maxed-out hitting numbers due to their strength garnered from the Prince of Darkness.
While the announcement was met with surprise and complaints from some of the game's fans, the makers of MLB The Show 24 expressed excitement at what the activist group could bring to the table. "We decided having an actual major league baseball player on the cover every year was getting too boring," said Rob Derby of Sony Interactive Entertainment. "Plus, name a more recognizable face from last year's season than these fellas. It can't be done. Move over, Ohtani - there's a new star in town."
At publishing time, the Catholic Church had advised scheduling an exorcism for anyone who already pre-ordered a copy of the game.
DOGE is here, and Elon and Vivek will eliminate millions of government positions