Sad: With USAID Shut Down, This Ecuadorian Child May Never Know What Gender He Is

World · Feb 5, 2025 · BabylonBee.com
Fernanda Reyes via Shutterstock.com
Image for article: Sad: With USAID Shut Down, This Ecuadorian Child May Never Know What Gender He Is

ECUADOR — In a horrific tragedy caused by USAID's termination, 8-year-old Antonio Gonzalez of Ecuador may never have a chance to find out what gender he is.

Gonzalez had enrolled in an USAID-sponsored elementary students' class on how to properly determine his true gender, but will now never have the chance to attend. The devastating funding cuts will also prevent Gonzalez from attending other USAID activities like rainbow fingernail painting, queer theater day, and furry Saturday.

"Antonio will now forever be left to believe he is simply a boy. It is heartbreaking," said USAID volunteer Lana Thomas. "This poor child won't even know what bathroom to use now, since we never got to put on our skit on genderfluid bathroom choices. What a tragedy."

Gonzalez's misfortune has sparked a wave of outrage across social media. "How dare Trump deny this precious Ecuadorian child the chance to discover his real gender," said AP journalist Bart Bagley. "Poor Antonio may go his whole life now, never realizing he is actually part boy, part girl, and part fairy. Justice for Antonio!"

At publishing time, Gonzalez had been asked for comment, but was too busy building a slingshot with some other boys.


California transplants Steve and Timpani try to be the perfect Texas hosts for Brittuni's visit, but Steve quickly realizes he needs a sensible vehicle now that he's about to become a dad.

Click to watch the latest sketch!