WASHINGTON, D.C. — Liberals expressed outrage today after President Trump signed an executive order this afternoon that men cannot punch women in the face for sport.
The order further states that mediocre male athletes have to hit the gym and try harder if they want to win.
"It is a sad day in America when men cannot punch women in the face," said ESPN executive James Pitaro. "We at ESPN are appalled that we cannot televise men kicking the crap out of women while we cheer. President Trump has gone too far."
Trump announced the executive order to a room full of female athletes who were excited about the prospect of not being punched by men. "I know it's a very controversial thing, but I am very proud to sign the 'No Men Punching Women In The Face' order today," announced Trump. "There's a lot of people who want to see women punched in the face for some reason, which is very sad, because women are so beautiful. We're going to put a stop to it."
At publishing time, liberals had again begun screaming in fury after Trump signed another executive order stating that men cannot go in women's locker rooms for fun.
As the immigration debate rages on, Democrats are now ringing alarm bells as thousands of child traffickers are out of work.
