U.S.—During an ecumenical council convened Thursday, representatives from a wide range of Christian denominations universally voted to recognize the 1987 film The Princess Bride and the novel upon which it was based as inspired Scripture.
The film and book were added to the biblical canon, now finally being recognized as inerrant, inspired revelation from on high. Christians have long suspected the work was a latter-day message from the Lord but have finally officially recognized the revered status of the work.
Advocates for the proposal pointed out how highly quotable the film is and how it's completely perfect, without any mixture of error. "From the fight scene atop the Cliffs of Insanity to the classic battle of wits and the assault on the castle, this work has the ring of truth to it," said Rev. Kevin DeYoung as he addressed the assembly. "It's obvious that every word, every jot, every tittle of this film was handed down directly from the Lord."
DeYoung also warned that not to recognize The Princess Bride as Scripture would be to fall into one of the "classic blunders, akin to getting involved in a land war in Asia or challenging a Sicilian when death is on the line."
"The vote is 927-0 for inducting The Princess Bride into the canon," said one official presiding over the proceedings. "As you wish. The Princess Bride is now the last book of the Bible. Amen." The denominational representatives gathered then voted to watch the film for the seventh time of the day, just to verify their findings.
Critics of the move included Pastor John MacArthur, who called the recognition of revelation after the closing of the NT canon "inconceivable" and said the heretics who voted for the resolution should "prepare to die."