FOX CHAPEL, PA — Local parents Dave and Stacey Martin, who raised their daughter on Disney movies that glamorized rebelling against parents, are flabbergasted to see their teenage daughter now rebelling against her parents.
"I just don't get it," said Dave Martin to reporters. "Every movie and song she listened to growing up featured positive messages about listening to her heart, and now she won't listen to me! It's so weird!"
Sources say Dave's conflict with his daughter came to a head last night when she defied her father like Moana to sneak out of the house like Ariel, which led to her meeting a strange man just like Pocahontas, only to hang out with the wrong crowd and get gender-confused like Mulan. "What on earth could possibly be influencing her to behave so recklessly?" said Mr. Martin.
At publishing time, the parents had addressed the situation by making their daughter stay home all weekend and do chores like Cinderella.
It's a serious medical emergency: you're minding your own business when you hear an opinion you slightly disagree with.