GAZA — Local man Ahmed Ghazali was at Al-Shifa hospital for a colonoscopy this morning when he became a little unsure about the gastroenterologist strapped with explosives and wielding a grenade launcher.
"I'm starting to have second thoughts about this, doc," said Mr. Ghazali, shifting nervously. "I mean you're the doctor, not me -- I just don't remember any rocket-propelled grenades during my last colonoscopy. That's all I'm saying, doc."
While not looking forward to his colonoscopy to begin with, the sight of a grenade launcher really threw Mr. Ghazali for a loop. "Granted, I don't remember what happened during my last colonoscopy," said Mr. Ghazali. "I could have sworn the nurse wasn't wearing a vest rigged to explode. And I really don't recall the sound of small arms fire coming from the cancer ward. I'm not complaining, it's just a very different experience."
Mr. Ghazali tried to remember the diameter of the colonoscopy camera he had seen in the past, then surveyed the grenade launcher. "This just doesn't look good," said Mr. Ghazali. "The math, the physics of it all, it's really got my anxiety going. Wait, doc - why is the anesthesiologist holding a grenade and wearing a GoPro?"
At publishing time, Mr. Ghazali had decided that he was going to look for a new gastroenterologist.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
