HOLLYWOOD — On Sunday, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences awarded the Oscar for best actor in a leading role to a young Ukrainian man for his hard work on and off the screen. Volodymyr Zelenskyy is the first person who identifies as a world leader to win an Oscar.
Zelenskyy received a standing ovation as he walked down the aisle of the historic Dolby Theater to accept the golden Oscar statue, which sources confirm he later sold to Brendan Fraser.
While waving the Oscar statuette around wildly, he said, "For all the little boys and girls who look like me watching tonight, this is a beacon of hope and possibility. I am the world's greatest hero!"
"Also, please send more money for bombs."
He dedicated his win to President Biden, whom he referred to as "a nice old man who gives out sour candy."
This is the first time in its 95-year history that The Academy has ever awarded the Oscar for best actor to an individual who appeared in no movies in the past year. It also marks the first time a winner was not even listed among the nominees.
At publishing time, Zelenskyy had been seen outside the Dolby Theater asking stars to donate their goody bags.
Kyle Mann was just minding his own business, when- BOOP! A wild Gender Fairy appeared!