SANTA MONICA, CA—Activision surprised the gaming world with a new game trailer revealing the next game in the popular Call of Duty series. Set to be released any day now, Call of Duty: Rittenhouse lets you defend your home from a horde of bloodthirsty communists.
“Developers have toiled this past year without sleep, food, or contact with loved ones, so we could launch this politically poignant and incredibly fulfilling game in time for the Holidays and the jury’s verdict of not guilty,” said Activision CEO, Roberto Activision.
Some reviewers with advanced copies have expressed worry about how the game presents the hordes of communists, citing an overreliance on the trope of fighting zombies.
“While it’s fun blasting the mindless, pale, pasty, brain-dead, weak, pathetic, unhealthy, delusional horde of Antifa commies, I still feel like I’m just playing Left4Dead again,” said video game reviewer Stan Gatan. “Then again, it just feels right blowing the heads off clueless idiots trying to destroy the homes of hard-working Americans. 9.5 out of 10.”
Activision also revealed a special expansion that lets players defend the U.S. Capitol from terrifying hordes of Qanon-worshipping Trump supporters.
The left, celebrities, and athletes will take money from China, but they sure don't like talking about China. Tap your foot to the hit song parody of "We Don't Talk About Bruno"!