Millions Become Pro-Life After Learning They Won't Have To Listen to Pink Anymore
Entertainment · Jun 28, 2022 ·

U.S. — Singer-songwriter Pink took to Twitter following the landmark Supreme Court decision overturning Roe v. Wade, telling all pro-life fans to stop listening to her music. Millions have since joined the pro-life cause to avoid what they call "Pink's terrible music."

"This was an easy choice – it's like when I found out I could avoid Neil Young's horrible warbling by becoming a Joe Rogan fan." Local woman Emily Winnow told reporters that her long hesitations about becoming pro-life melted away when she realized she would never have to listen to what she called "obnoxious, shrill songs" like "Just Give Me A Reason" or "Get the Party Started" again. "Man, I love being pro-life!" she said.

Since Pink's announcement, the ranks of the Pro-Life movement have swelled by an estimated 5 million, with a vast portion of the new pro-lifers confirming that they viewed the ideological shift as an opportunity to escape "preachy feminist pop worse than Ke$ha, Katy Perry, and Taylor Swift combined."

Unfortunately, several million people switched back to being pro-choice after realizing pro-lifers listen to Hillsong.

FBI agents Scoulder and Mully hold a press conference where they reveal the incriminating evidence found in Trump's safe. This raid was definitely justified.

Subscribe to The Babylon Bee on YouTube


There are 85 comments on this article.

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.