PROVO, UT - After an exhausting conversation with some friends about his church, local member of the Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints LaDell Ballard wished there were a shorter way members of the Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints could say they were members of the Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints.
"Latter-Day Christians?" thought LaDell as he corralled his children into the minivan so they could get to Chick-Fil-A for dinner before the onslaught of other minivans. "Christians in These Latter Days? MOTCOJCOLDS?"
While LaDell ordered a twelve-thousand-piece chicken nugget crate, his one wife Maddheleiynne suggested they could come up with some sort of nickname inspired by ancient scriptures, such as the Bible or his religion's Book of Mormon, but no good nicknames jumped out at them.
Finally, in a moment of inspired personal revelation, LaDell realized he could shorten the name of the Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints by calling it the Church of Jesus Christ Of Later-Day Saints.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
