CHINO, CA—Local man Barrett Hampton encountered a nasty 10-Matchbox-car pileup on his evening commute Monday.
He was making good time from his makeshift upstairs office to the living room when he had to put on the brakes, spotting the brutal car crash just ahead.
"Honey, I'm gonna be late -- there's a huge accident up ahead," he said, phoning his wife, who was sitting on the couch ten feet away. "Oh, man, it looks bad. A Hummer is dangling off a cliff, there's a jackknifed trailer attached to a Jeep, and there's some kind of dune buggy flipped over. What's with all the dune buggies out today? And... does that car up there have a mounted .50 caliber machine gun? I'd better try to get around this."
The man attempted to reroute himself around the accident but immediately stepped on a Lego.
Breaking: Paypal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered Paypal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added Paypal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.