Ladies: Here Are 9 Easy Ways To Comfort Your Man When His Favorite Sports Team Loses
Sports · Jun 22, 2024 · BabylonBee.com

Nothing can send an otherwise well-adjusted man into a sudden tailspin of depression quite like his favorite sports team losing. Ladies, here are nine ways you can comfort your man when such a tragedy unfolds:

  1. Remind him that it's just a game: This will help put things back in perspective.

  2. Ask him again which team lost and by how much: He needs to process this.

  3. Stand in front of the screen for the last 5 minutes of the game and ask if he wants to talk about his feelings: Obviously, he has some things he needs to express.

  4. Be super, extra cheerful to help offset his sadness: This will right the ship in no time.

  5. Tell him you're very sorry about his team not getting the golden snitch or whatever, now pass the wine: Empathy is so important.

  6. Remind him that his team's all-star third baseman with a career WAR over 50 who's been on the IL since April did great in his AAA rehab start and is close to activation: You won't believe how his eyes will light up.

  7. Ask if now is a good time to talk about getting off birth control: This will be a welcome distraction.

  8. Tell him it's too bad about the large men in another city not hitting the ball with the stick better: Let him know you really care.

  9. Ask him why he doesn't just root for a better team: Help him see the error of his foolish, foolish ways.

Follow these nine easy steps, and your man will beat the post-loss doldrums in no time!


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